The Twins recap Married at First Sight ep 19: Nasser is a man possessed.

Video by Channel 9

Something is happening between Gab and Nasser, and there are only two possibilities.

  1. The random apartment Gab has rented is haunted and the ghosts are opening doors, breaking beds, ruining marriages, etc.
  2. A ghost has possessed Nasser and now he throws more tantrums than usual and drives really slow on his scooter.

Honestly, if there’s one thing this season is missing, it’s a paranormal story line. And Nasser has given us one.

Booga booga

But in all seriousness, he's decided he doesn't want to be with Gab and lying about a ghost seems... immature.

During lunch with Gab's twin sister Kerri, Nasser calmly explains, "The place we're staying at now is possessed. I have a bad vibe." He says he can't possibly be expected to stay in that apartment, given the dangerousness of the ghosts, etc, and starts yelling in public when Gab tries to reason with him.

Kerri is skeptical, mostly because ghosts aren't real, but also because Nasser is a 50-year-old man who is scared to sleep over at someone else's house.

When Gab asks her sister what she thinks of Nasser, Kerri very clearly says.... no. Gab feels relieved because she was kinda sick of being screamed at about ghosts in public.

Meanwhile, Ashley and Troy have found a fair in the Gold Coast, because the only time they get along is when they're doing activities specifically designed for children.

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Ashley decides she wants Troy to win a stuffed toy for her and we all know this is going to end badly for everyone but mostly Troy. He tries a ring toss game and misses every single throw before claiming it was rigged, which it most definitely was not.

"I need something with true skill," he explains. "Like the basketball one, I'd smash it."

Unconditionally.

Oh.

The producers have found a basketball ring game, and yeah, Troy misses every throw. It's at this point we realise the doofus music when Troy is on screen isn't clear enough, and decide to write to Channel 9 and tell them to make it approximately six times more dopey, pls.

Ashley wins her own toy and instead of being happy that at least one person in this relationship is moderately coordinated, Troy complains that the rings weren't NBA standard and omg pls don't pretend that would have made a difference you're embarrassing yourself.

"Too bad they don't have a tennis game here," Troy says and no, that's not too bad. That's very lucky.

STOP NOW.

Because, yes, Telv and Sarah did have sex, and yes, it was quite nice thanks for asking.

But now they're literally doing stuff for homeless people and it makes us feel bad because up until this point we had literally forgotten about charity/kindness/being good to others.

Oops.

They're packing supplies for people in need, and Telv says that when he was growing up, he was one of those people, because his mum was a victim of domestic violence.

He starts explaining what it was like to not have a roof over your head and then he's GODDAMN CRYING AND WE CAN'T FKN DO THIS. IT WASN'T PART OF THE DEAL. THIS SHOW IS MEANT TO BE ABOUT TEXTIN' SCANDALS AND BAD AUSSIE RAPPERS AND OCCASIONALLY GHOSTS. NOT FEELINGS.

Oh thank God Justin and Carly are having a conversation about their relationship which is ridiculous, especially considering all Justin's done during this homestay is tried to convince Carly to get an ice-cream machine for her kitchen even though she a) doesn't want one, and b) we're not entirely sure he actually sells them.

He's worried that if he shows her any form of affection/physical contact she'll get the wrong signals, as though Carly is an illogical human being who thinks the man who last week randomly decided to go to Milan is actually madly in love with her.

Basically, Justin doesn't want to lead Carly on, which is probably something he should've thought about before he decided to marry her on national television but whatevs.

Nasser is a changed man and we do not appreciate it at all. We discuss on the Married at First Sight recap podcast. Post continues below.

At one point, Justin is eating Thai food in Carly's kitchen and casually says he's going to buy the Thai restaurant and franchise it.

Justin, no. 

You've already ruined ice cream, we shan't let you ruin Thai food. Some things are sacred.

In Perth, Tracey is forcing Dean to come clean about his textin' scandal for the 647th time.

But when he tells Tracey's parents that, yeah, he'd been married to their daughter for roughly two weeks when he started to cheat, Tracey's mum nods and says, "these things are bound to happen".

...

We profoundly disagree.

It's kinda my thing.

Dean feels relieved and also wonders if he should ask Tracey's mum for her number.

That's when... it happens.

It's Tracey. She's dressed in exercise gear. But there's something urban about it. Dean is also looking more like his alter-ego Visionz than usual.

Then Tracey shares the plan.

She's taking Dean to a hip hop dancing class and no this is the single worst idea we have ever heard.

No person should try hip hop dancing for the first time in their thirties, and they should most definitely not try it with a person they are trying to impress. That's just bizarre.

This is wildly humiliating.

The hip hop teacher is attractive and surprisingly quite a talented hip hop dancer. For Dean and Tracey, it's all fun and games until they're asked to do a hip hop dancing battle in front of the person they've been dating for four weeks but also all of Australia.

We want to die and that is not an exaggeration.

Then, Tracey decides to do a rap for Dean, because she never got the chance to reply when he rapped for her. But she did. We were there. We heard it. We wrote about it in our diaries recap later that night. So for reasons that make no sense, we're forced to endure another rap from a person who can't rap, which we simply refuse to cover in any meaningful way.

PAUSE Nasser has returned to Gab's haunted apartment and asks her to tell him what they're doing today because he probably won't be doing it.

Wot.

She tells him she wanted to introduce him to her friends and he essentially says, "there's no shops around here and I don't like the vibe" and leaves.

That night, Gab has to explain to her friends, all of whom are grown women, that her fake husband couldn't be here because he's scared of ghosts and her apartment, which they are standing in, is possessed.

Gab's friends joke about how silly it is to believe in ghosts and how they should give the ghost a name and everyone's laughing which seems exactly how most scary movies start. 

"That's just silly."

Speaking of scary movies, Troy and Ashley have gone to visit Ashley's parents. Ashley's mum asks about their best and worst moments, and obviously Troy's best moment was swimming with dolphins yesterday, because he found his people, realised where he belongs, etc.

But then he has to tell that goddamn story about Ashley overhearing him telling a goddamn producer about something to do with goddamn sex, and it takes him in excess of six hours to communicate which is frustrating but also boring.

Ashley gets mad, which is out of character.

Outside, Ashley's dad, who has inexplicably left the room and also his own house, is talking to the cameras about how Troy might be nervous, and maybe that's why he's acting so weird (it's... not). But the camera man has to interrupt him because in the background, Troy and Ashley are having a fight about how Troy didn't tell the story honestly and also took three days to tell it. Ashley storms out which, while justified, also seems to be entirely ineffective at this point.

If you look very closely at Troy's face, you can tell that he's thinking, "you know who wouldn't be yelling at me? The dolphin from yesterday" and... he has a point.

UNTIL TOMORROW NIGHT.

You can listen to the full episode of our Married at First Sight recap podcast, here.

You can follow Clare and Jessie Stephens on Facebook OR join our 'Married at First Sight Lols' Facebook group, where we spend the majority of our time.

Catch up on all our recaps here:

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 14: Dean’s been hiding something from us. Not again.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 12: Is this the biggest betrayal we’ve ever seen?

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 11: The forbidden date with a cruel twist.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 10: The texting scandal breaking up two marriages.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 8: Davina just tried to steal someone’s husband.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 7: The most cringeworthy honeymoon we’ve ever seen.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 6: There’s a millionaire who’s in for a shock.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 5: The man who just stumped Australia.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 4: "You make me feel sick."

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 3: There is one VERY disappointed mother-in-law.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 2: A bride walks down the aisle. And there’s no groom.

The Twins recap Married at First Sight episode 1: Tracey has a ‘secret’.

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