We open with Davina and Dean discussing their catch up, which has been ‘tomorrow’ for like eight days now, and we – personally – are tired of waiting.
Dean says that he and Tracey have issues, most notably that Dean would like to be with Davina instead, pls.
Davina is also sick of Ryan, which she kindly lets him know by ENCOURAGING HIM TO GET A TATTOO OF HER FACE. While watching him get a tattoo, she decides she’d like one too, so suggests they get matching love hearts as a permanent reminder of how ambivalent she feels towards him.
While Ryan is getting the love heart, Davina is locked in a small room by producers, and yells “There’s not a romantic connection” a little too loudly.
Davina just got a message. From Deano. About their meet up.
“He actually gives me butterflies,” she exclaims, as though she expects the response to be “awww babe, good for you!”
But that is not our response.
She makes a variety of facial expressions to convey her excitement and we are NOT here for it, but we also very much are. From a distance. With our judgin’ hats on.