You've probably read road-tests of editors trialling new skincare, perhaps a fashion line, a book maybe? But I'm pretty sure no one has done a road-test of a 24-door sex toy advent calendar.

Yes folks, we're breaking new ground here and I apologise in advance for all the oversharing you're about to be walloped with.

Quick watch: Men hilariously try to explain women's sex toys. Post continues after video.

I am graciously tackling the Lovehoney Sex Toy Advent Calendar, which promises 24 kinky treats behind every door. And I'll be giving you a sneak preview of all the goodies you can get in there, as well as an honest opinion of what I really think of it - because at over $100 buckeroonies for this advent calendar you're gonna want the truth.

So here goes. 24 days of sex toy testing. Pray for

me

my vagina.

Day 1: The bullet vibrator.

Ahh the humble bullet. What a classy way to kick-start this kinky adventure.

In my personal opinion, I think these are the most under-rated of all the sex toys. They are usually the best for beginners, but I have a sneaking suspicion that most people crawl back to their OG bullet time and time again.

AND WITH GOOD REASON.

This little guy was quiet, powerful and actually kinda cute with this cosmic looking bod. I was a fan.

Score of this door: 9/10.

Day 2: A dick sleeve.

I know what you're thinking: don't dicks already have... sleeves?

And you are very right. But you can also purchase jelly jackets for them.

These squidgy fellas wrap around the shaft of the penis after you stretch that strangely small looking hole around them. The beads hidden inside add extra pressure and it supposedly feels like a teeny tiny hot stone massage on your willy. Noice.

One top tip though: If you're looking to use one of these, particularly for the first time, then make sure you lube it up. And be generous with your dollop, because dry sleeve on dry dick is painful.

PS. These are notoriously hard to clean, so lots of people chuck them after one use.

Score of this door: 4/10. (cos, environment)

Day 3: Massage oil.

Oh hello!

I wasn't expecting to find ~accessories~ in this advent calendar, but actually I'm pretty stoked about it. Sex accoutrements can be immensely handy and ramp up the sexual atmosphere in a flash.

This massage oil (with vanilla bean, ooh la la) was lovely and luxurious on the skin, and was the perfect excuse to force my partner to give me a back rub. GENIUS.

Score of this door: 7/10.

Day 4: Blindfold /napping mask.

Day four saw me unwrapping a ' starry eyed blindfold' to help me 'indulge in the world of sensory deprivation'.

In reality, on day four I had a really nice midday nap with the aforementioned blindfold.

Score of this door: 8/10.

Day 5: KEGEL BALLS!

Kegel balls, if you didn't know, are like a miniature home gym for your vagina.

Not really known for their sexual pleasure prowess, kegel balls are instead there to help you beef up your pelvic floor. Known beneficial side effects to using kegel balls are stronger muscles (which seriously help during childbirth if that's coming up in your schedule) as well as tightening up your pelvic floor which can lead to bigger, fuller orgasms. YAY.

If you're wondering how to use these jazzy little dudes, pop them up your vagina (with their silicone sling all attached) until both balls are secure and the silicone string is hanging out. Yes, like a tampon, get over it. Then you simply squeeze your pelvic floor so you can feel your body almost trying to crush the kegel balls. It'll feel super weird at first, but it becomes quite a comforting feeling after a while.

Then once you feel like your session should wrap up, whip the kegel balls out by pulling on the string and wash them as you would your other sex toys. I'm pretty sure a kegel session counts as your workout for the day, so feel free to skip the gym and tell them 'Katie said it was all G'.

Score of this door: 10/10.

Day 6: Cock ring.

For some reason the second I opened this Taylor Swift lyrics popped into my head...

"I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with

paper rings

a cock ring. Uh OH. That's right."

Would I accept a proposal with a cock ring? Probably not. BUT I would gift this puppy to a pal as a wedding present. So, similar?

The silicone on this vibrating love ring is so plush and fancy, and the ring part (where the shaft goes) is stretchy enough to not be uncomfortable to put on, but restrictive enough to get the blood pumping. AKA the cock-ring-sweet-spot.

Score of this door: 8/10.

Day 7: Shagging cards.

You know what I didn't know I needed? Shagging cards, that's what.

Behind door number seven was a delightful deck of cards each emblazoned with a different sex position. There were some fairly stock-standard options in there as well as some seriously fruity numbers.

Despite them being a little startling on first view (and definitely not something you should leave lying around if there are youths in the house), it was actually so fun to play around with these. It is hands-down the easiest way to shake things up if you feel like you've settled into a routine in bed because you shuffle, pick out a card and BOOM, copy and paste.

Score of this door: 9/10.

Day 8: A pom pom tickler.

My partner is perhaps the most ticklish person on the planet, so if I used this as suggested ('gently stroke up and down their body, awakening their nerve-endings and making them ache for you'), he would have straight-up murdered me in cold blood.

Score of this door: 2/10. (Was cute, but unusable for me as anything other than a keyring.)

Day 9: Nipple clamps.

What I have learnt from this advent calendar is that my nipples are dead to me.

Seriously, I got zero pleasure from this and also barely any pain. Should I see a doctor about this? Probs.

Score of this door: 0/10.

Day 10: Slimline butt plug.

It's time for a truth circle, gather round...

I'm not a butt-stuff kinda gal.

I know that's probably some sort of sin if I'm also a sex editor, but everyone has those things they're just not personally interested in, and that for me is booty play. SORRY.

So for that reason, I didn't take this little dude for a spin. I did, however, wrap it up along with some other anal toys for a 'Bad Santa' present which I can really recommend doing because the reactions are golden, I tell you. Golden!

Score of this door: N/A due to my butt.

Day 11: Starfish massaging thingy.

I know that I have failed you miserably on day 10, but I am coming back strong for day 11 because I LOVE MASSAGES. I would happily have one every single day, and I quite enjoy giving them too.

For that reason, this was a great addition to the advent calendar. And this particular starfishy-style design is genius. It gets into all the nooks and crannies and allows you to put some goooood pressure on.

Fun fact: Pairing this with the vanilla massage oil from day three is a real treat. Particularly if you've got any dodgy knots you want to iron out before you get down to ~business~.

Score of this door: 10/10.

Day 12: Wrist restraints.