Channel Ten has been doing some teasin’.
We know three people leave paradise tonight, and the ads keep asking us: IS IT KEIRA?
To be clear, Keira has never been happier than she is in paradise. She’s living off a liquid diet made up exclusively of mango daiquiris, has a Jarrod whom she owns, and gossip at her fingertips at all times.
Keira lives here now. She is never going home.
We begin with some riveting conversation which involves Michael asking Megan whether she thinks Lisa will give him her rose, and Megan awkwardly saying, “oh um… no, definitely not” but it’s quickly interrupted by one of Bachelor in Paradise’s favourite tropes: the ominous bird.
A rogue bird that just definitely isn't native to Fiji emerges out of the bushes and starts charging at the camera. He squarks aggressively, and he's obviously telling us there's a new Canadian about to arrive and he's probably going to stir some shit.
Without introduction from Osher, who is deep in important bird-training, Tom from The Bachelor in Canada arrives.
At first, we're annoyed. We already have an anonymous foreigner so we're not really sure what purpose of Tom... is. But he asks to speak to Megan, and straight away she decides she likes him better than stupid Jake, which feels like a huge call to make after three minutes but okay.
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Keira also mentions that Tom is her type but NO KEIRA YOU ALREADY HAVE A JARROD AND YOU SHAN'T DO THIS TO HIM AGAIN. YOU SHAN'T.
Michael decides now is probably a good time to pull Lisa away for a chat about his feelings, and we've personally never seen two people sit further apart.