dating

'He stripped in the middle of the road.' 17 women on the worst date they've ever had.

I have a confession

I love hearing about bad dates. Come on, I know you do too. 

Yes, going on a bad date in the moment is annoying and emotionally draining. You've carved out time in your schedule to get ready and meet a person who you will never want to see again and then you're most likely to do it all over again with someone else. 

I've had my fair share of horrible dates. 

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One in particular that still haunts me is when I went on a dinner date with a guy in my early 20s. 

We went to a small Italian restaurant, where the tables were so close you were basically touching shoulders with the other patrons sitting on either side of you. 

The guy I was with was so rude to the server to the point where everyone else in the restaurant was starring at us and definitely talking about the situation on their tables. This guy provided them with a great source of entertainment. 

I felt so bad that before we finished our meal, I went over to her and paid for the full meal and gave her a 30 per cent tip (I know, I'm an angel). I was mortified by his behaviour. To top it off, halfway through our meal, he interrupted me to ask if I wanted to play truth or dare. Before I could answer, he said "Do you dare me to eat a spoon full of this chili oil?" To which I replied, "no". He ignored me, ate the chili oil and then asked "Do you dare me to ask the waitress for a glass of milk?" 

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As I hope you can tell, there was no second date. 

I knew I couldn't be the only one who has a first date experience that will haunt them for the rest of their life, so I asked 17 women to share their own stories. Grab the popcorn! 

Steph.

"A guy wanted to cook for me. I went to his apartment and was chatting as he prepared steak and salad. He pulled steak out of the fridge and the smell was HORRENDOUS. It was so off it was green, yet... he proceeded to cut the 'worst bits' off and cook it."

Olivia.

"I went for a coffee first date with a man and when I told him afterwards that he was nice but I didn't want to see him again, he stripped in the middle of the main road and demanded I tell him why as he had, and I quote, 'a great body.' I ran away in embarrassment."

Maddie. 

"First (and last) date! He suggested a pub with a $10 schnitzel special. He polished his schnitty off in under five minutes but held onto his fork so that he could steal each piece of my schnitty as I cut it... He even dipped it in gravy and took a chippy on his way! The date ended in under an hour, but not before he asked for the $10 to cover my meal." 

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Jane.

"Five minutes into the date, he told me if Scarlett Johansson walked in he’d leave me. He then fell in love with the girl that was sitting at the table next to us. She and her friend joined us and he told them that I’m 'not his type'." 

Jess.

"My date was pulled over by the cops on his way to meet me and he filmed the entire 25 minute interaction with them. He then made me watch the entire video of him verbally abusing these poor police officers while they were just trying to do their jobs. There definitely was not a second date."

Farah.

"We met on a dating app and went on a coffee date. We went to a local cafe where I chose a booth type table. Rather than sitting opposite, he sat beside me, 'locking' me in. 

The conversation was bland and boring, but just got worse when he decided I needed to know in detail about how he lost the tip of his pinkie finger... including photos. He also tried the 'yawn-reach-over-my-shoulder' move. 

I could not get out of there fast enough and as soon as I got home, I sent him the 'Thanks, I’m just not sure this will go anywhere' message. His response told me that it was my best decision as it was colourful and like a child throwing a tantrum."

Sarah.

"The guy I was going on a date with messaged me saying that he was running late and so I didn’t rush to get there as I didn’t want to wait alone for 20 mins. So I ended up arriving later than him... he got a bit aggressive towards me as I was there later than him. Then, he was rude to all the wait staff. The final red flag was that he complained about his parents and sisters the whole time. I got a message for a second date and declined."

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Casey.

"I went to a guy's house to watch a movie. He parked down the street and climbed through the neighbour's fence so his parents didn't know he was there. He took me or his ' granny flat' which was a tin shed and then did a Bruce Almighty strip to reveal his super man underpants. When I said that we were no way in hell having sex, he made me find my own way home."

Tara.

"I met this man at a dog park. When I told him that I didn't want to see him again, he threatened to follow me home and cruise around town to find my car and see where I lived (small town). It was super scary."

Michelle.

"I went on a date with a guy who insisted we meet at a very specific coffee shop (spoiler: he doesn't drink coffee). He also insisted in sitting in a specific seat at the window so he could keep an eye on his car... a 1990s Toyota Corolla. He didn't want it to get damaged."

Linda.

"I went on a coffee date with a guy and when I told him that I didn't want a second date, he demanded his money back for the coffee that he was very insistent that he pay for. I gave him the three dollars and thanked my lucky stars."

Jaime.

"Okay, so my first date was with this guy from a dating app. We were out having a few drinks and he said 'Let's go back to my place.' (A bit sketch but I was 18 and horny). He said 'I still live with my parents but they aren’t home'. Anyway, we get back to his place and much to my dismay, his parents are sitting in the living room WITH HIS GRANDPARENTS. Upon invitation, we sat down as a family and had some pasta for dinner. In the end, I found his grandparents more interesting than him and that was the first/last date of ours."

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Natalie.

"It was during covid, when walking dates were all we could do, and everyone went a bit... strange. The lead-up to this 'date' was fraught — he'd bailed on me a couple of times, he was 45 minutes late, so I didn't go in with great expectations, but I'd been locked alone in a house for months so desperation was creeping in. 

Before he arrived, he told me he had a gift for me, which freaked me out. He got to our meeting point, handed it over and I unwrapped it and had NO IDEA what it was. It looked like a kids' activity pack, but inside were cardboard cutouts of phones, SD cards... 'Do you know what it is?!' he asked, oddly excited as I shook my head. 

'I spent a lot of time in China (FYI he was not Chinese) and over there at funerals, traditionally families throw the dead person's valuables into the grave with them to take to the next life.' (Cue me backing away slowly, eyes darting frantically, fake smile plastered on my face.) 'But so they don't have to throw away ACTUAL valuables, most Chinese grocers sell these.' There was... not a second date."

Steph.

"Met up for a quiet drink. We had a good chat online and he seemed like a nice bloke. 10 minutes into the conversation, he whips out his phone and starts flicking through photos of all of his current sexual partners. He wanted to know if I’d fancy a threesome. No detail was left unturned… a full rundown ensued about these women, their bodies and fantasies. Then he got into more pictures of his BDSM parties and wanted to know if I wanted to join him for one he was hosting that night. I finished my drink and politely excused myself. The end."

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Nella.

"I went on a date with a guy who said he was separated... Turned out he was separated for three days because his wife threw him out and he didn't have choice. He was sleeping on his sisters couch. When I asked how long he had been separated for he started to sob uncontrollably and spill the story. 

He was so lonely after three days and wanted to get laid. I left $5 on table and crept away quietly while he sobbed." 

Harriet.

"I went on a date with a guy who promptly disappeared outside to have a smoke and he never came back. He didn't bother to say bye, so I drank my drink and left him to it."

Taylor.

"We went out for dumplings, and you know how you mix up your own sauce for dipping, with the soy and the chilli and the vinegar? Well, they didn't give us separate bowls, and we were like, sure we can share a regular sized bowl. But... he kept the dumplings near him and every time I'd eat one, he'd drop a couple more in the bowl of sauce to 'soak', leaving me to grab them from the dish. I... couldn't just get my own dumpling and dip it. It was weird."

Do you have a wild dating story? Tell us in the comments!

If you want more culture opinions by Emily Vernem, you can follow her on Instagram @emilyvernem. 

Feature image: Canva.

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