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We often joke about reality TV, laughing it off as vapid and a bit… unrealistic.
And sure, it can be. A lot of the time it deserves an eye roll. But reality TV can also hold up a lens to society and highlight all the shit, good and bad, that goes on around us.
Angie Kent on what her relationship with her bachie winner is like now. Post continues below video.
This season ofThe Bachelorettehas done just that: It’s more than just a woman dating a bunch of dudes. It’s a confident, funny, multifaceted, feminist woman dating a selection of men, many of whom have rejected everything society tries to teach them about being a dude.
We hear the words ‘toxic masculinity’ a lot these days. And while it’s crucial that we continue to call out that behaviour, talk about it, make clear it’s not okay and work towards a society where it’s not
celebrated
normalised or swept under the rug, we also reckon it’s important to celebrate the complete opposite of it.And bless,somany of the men on this season ofThe Bacheloretteare the opposite of it.

THEY SHARE EARRINGS
We've learned that toxic behaviour and attitudes are still out there, still harming womenandmen, but we also learned that it's not the default setting, as we would have once assumed.

More men like this, please.
Masculinity is not saying inappropriate things about women and bragging about how you would kiss a woman who's not interested and masculinity is not throwing a tantrum because you're dressed as a chicken (#neverforget).
Masculinity is:
Ciarran fully crying on TV because his nan died is the living opposite of toxic masculinity and I hope he’s doing much better now. I’m gonna miss him and his brilliant sense of humour and outrageous fashion ❤️ #BacheloretteAU
— Fiza Zali (@fizawanders) October 31, 2019
Plus, masculinity is this wonderful producer letting a spiralling, nervous Timm know that he doesn't always have to be 'the funny one'.

BLESS.
Minus a few duds, the casting of the men on thisBacheloretteseason has been stellar.
This is, overall, so far, the best group of bachelors on a bachelorette season. It makes me hope that masculinity is evolving for the better #BacheloretteAU
— Bachie Beast ???????????? (@BachieBeast) October 16, 2019
The more I think about this the more I'm impressed at the positive examples of masculinity on this season, men accessing their feelings everywhere, Ciarran openly grieving, Tim able to articulate and open up when he's sad, producers comforting people #BacheloretteAU https://t.co/LnWaBNmPMS
— Dame Kittness (@SoftKittyWarm) October 31, 2019
I'm willing to bet all women have met a Jess or a Jamie at some point in their lives. Those characters are familiar. We've seen enough of them in real lifeandon television to last us a lifetime.
Other reality shows should take note of how much Australia has fallen in love with contestants who have smashed toxic masculinity and gender stereotypes.
We're sick of the Jess and the Jamies, but we can never see enough Ciarrans and Timms, and even Carlins and Jacksons.
We need more of them on our screens (and in our lives), please.
Chelsea McLaughlin
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