'I travelled solo for 3 months without my husband. One comment about it made me furious.'

The moment the taxi drove away, my reality hit me like a tonne of bricks. 

After just spending two weeks exploring London and Paris with my partner, he was heading back home to Australia for work and I was staring down the barrel of the next 11 weeks travelling alone. 

I’d always dreamed of doing the proper backpacking adventure around Europe (original I know!) but my partner - who I’d been with for six years by this point - couldn’t get any more time off. 

“You should still just go for it,” he encouraged. 

So I bit the bullet and booked my dream holiday. But I was completely delulu thinking I’d find that much time on my own easy.

Horoscopes at the airport. Post continues below. 

Video via Mamamia

I’m one of those girls who goes to the bathroom with a friend on a night out. I’ll play a podcast if I’m home alone so there are other voices around. And the thought of going to the movies solo makes me want to cry for reasons I can’t quite explain. 

I also have that really fun combination of constantly wanting to be around people, but also being very self-conscious and automatically assuming everyone will hate me. 

How the hell was I going to survive three months solo!? 

While I’m not proud to admit it, I spent that first night silently sobbing into my lumpy hostel pillow while I was in LITERAL PARIS AND COULD’VE BEEN SILENTLY SOBBING AT THE ARC DE TRIOMPHE. 


Seriously, what an idiot I was wasting that time being sad. I had the opportunity of a lifetime that I’d spent years saving up for. 

But that next day at breakfast, still puffy from my riveting night of crying, an American girl sat down next to me and introduced herself. And, just like that, it felt like the Band-Aid had been ripped off. I'd made my first travel buddy. What was I worrying about? 

After a few weeks, I was well and truly into the swing of things. Making friends. Moving countries every few days. It was bliss.

I’d chat to my partner on the phone in the mornings before heading out to explore, then message him when I was back at my accommodation after a night out. 

Were there times I wished he was there with me? Absolutely. But there were also times I was bloody glad he wasn't. He hates dancing and heights, while I danced on tables in Greece and paraglided off a cliff in Switzerland - things I might not have done on a couples holiday. 

And every day I could feel how pushing myself to form new friendships and try new things was doing me good. 

When I boarded a sailboat in Croatia excited to spend the week with another set of strangers, I noticed one guy wearing a cricket shirt from my hometown. 

“Oh my god, we’re from the same suburb!” I said.

As we got chatting, we figured out we had a few mutual acquaintances and that he and his mates even knew my boyfriend through a friend. (And yes, I see the irony in the fact I travelled to the opposite side of the world just to meet people I could’ve met at home.) 


But later on, one guy pulled me up on something I’d said. 

“So you’ve got a boyfriend and you’re travelling alone? For how long?” he asked.

“Three months,” I told him. 

“Wow, if I had a girlfriend I’d never let her do that,” he laughed. 

Me and all my mates. Image: supplied. 

Now, I’m usually quite a calm person. In fact, I’d describe myself as a chronic people pleaser who actively avoids conflict. 

But the comment made me see red.

“That’s probably why you don’t have a girlfriend,” I blurted. “And he didn’t have to let me. I made the choice myself.” 


I was shocked it had even come out of my mouth but I meant what I said. 

The fact that this guy clearly wouldn’t trust a partner (or more likely himself!) to be in a relationship while away on a summer holiday spoke volumes about him. 

Of course, stewing on it later, I knew I’d been unfair on him. He’d just said what I was sure other people were thinking. It <was> unusual that I was away alone. Many couples can barely go a weekend without seeing each other. They probably thought my relationship was on the rocks and that I was going to cheat with the first guy I came across. 

But being away for so long crystalised a lot of things for me. 

The main one being that I very much wanted to marry my partner. 

It was something I already knew, of course, but meeting hundreds of strangers and not wanting to flirt with a single one of them - even knowing no one would ever find out - is definitely confirmation you’re in the right relationship. 

Spending that time doing what I wanted to do was the best gift he could’ve given me - I know if I’d given up on that dream and stayed home for his sake, I would’ve ended up resenting him. 

So whenever anyone talks to me about wanting to travel, but their partner isn't keen, my first reaction is always to say “just go alone!”

It really was the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. 

As for my relationship? We’re now married with a little girl and are planning to take her on many adventures together. And maybe apart. 

Feature Image: Supplied. 

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