By DR MELINDA HILDEBRANDT
For Amelia, the hoarding started small. Just a few disparate objects piled on top of her bed, seemingly chosen at random.
Then, the number of objects and their apparent randomness increased while the bed held fast as the breeding ground for greater mountains of ‘stuff’.
These Jenga-like structures comprised hard and plush toys, linen, cushions, whatever Amelia felt had that special quality, that hoard-worthy ‘X factor’. Sometimes these mountains were hidden under blankets, I suppose for safe-keeping. Who the hell knows?
The ‘point’ of this assemblage of things eluded me, but what was not in doubt was their deep importance to Amelia. She had a clear sense of purpose on hoard-making days, even rolled up her sleeves to better get on with the hard yakka this work entailed.
I did not give this new pastime much thought except to peer into her room from time to time and think, “Hmm…weird”. But the eccentricity of growing children takes on many forms and this was no more odd than a couple of other specialities like, say, chewing on a single grape for six hours or pretending to be blind (replete with ‘cane’) for an afternoon. Quirky is as quirky does.
At this early point, when she was about three, these pop-up installations were fairly temporary. Her attachment to them was shallow and fleeting. When the hoard-police (me) came to dismantle her handy-work, there was no problem and no argument. The piles of stuff had served some inner function, but she did not need to cling onto them then.
Top Comments
Can I ask, why does everyone say 'on the spectrum' nowadays instead of autistic? Is it considered insensitive to say autistic, and if so, why? Seems overly PC to me.I have a nephew with 'special needs' as they say now, I find that description to be very vague and not helpful as no-one really knows what that means.
It's not a PC thing Anon it is the Autism Spectrum. Eg Severe to High Functioning and everything in between.
It is a tool to help with diagnosis and then treatement/therapy.
I don't know that it's a PC thing - I think saying 'on the autism spectrum' helps to indicate the wide variety of functionality represented under that umbrella, from high to low. I hear what you're saying about 'special needs' but sometimes I use this one because its quicker that saying my daughter is deaf (and then explaining that) and has Asperger's Syndrome (now a term officially absorbed by ASD). Labels are useful sometimes but I agree they can lead to confusion. It's an interesting discussion in any case.
Ok,I kind of get it. But saying that a child is on the spectrum still gives no guide to how autistic they are any more than saying they are autistic.But maybe it doesn't matter.
My nephew is also described as having global developmental delays which is also misleading as delay implies that he may catch up to average kids his age, which he most certainly won't, it's not physically possible for him.
Anyway, perhaps a topic that could be discussed in a post one day..
Thanks so much everyone, for your kind words about my post. It's always nerve-wracking sharing personal stories about family life, so I am so glad that you liked it. This is only one part of a wider set of challenges we face at home, but I always try to think positively about Amelia's behaviour and who she is as a little person, no matter what's going on.
I am so pleased that for some of you there was a spark of recogniton too because I always feel less alone when I read similar stories to ours.
Thanks again for reading and responding! You all made my day.