Dear Catherine and William,
Can I call you Kate and Wills? No? Okay, probably not. But I have a serious bone to pick with you both and I couldn’t resist the urge to reach out.
Sure, you’ve got access to endless amounts of wealth and can afford nannies for the less desirable parts of raising three children, but I need you to know you’re starting to make the rest of us look bad.
Apart from the odd yawn from your youngest Louis, those children were patient and calm sitting through a service which, quite frankly, made some grown adults doze off.