Last Sunday, whilst sitting across from my two best friends sipping on a glass of wine, I was triggered.
And, despite my best attempt at playing it cool, I very nearly lost the plot.
You see, my friends are getting married. They got engaged last week.
Side note: Check out the engagement ring trends through the decades. Post continues below.
Right now, they are floating around in a beautiful, wonderful love bubble.
The proposal is recent enough that they are basically still living it and the wedding is far enough away that it’s not coming up in their wall planners just yet.
I watched as they giggled and chatted about wedding venues, bridal parties, colour schemes and honeymoon destinations. I felt happy for them - truly happy. This is something we’ve all been waiting for for a very long time.
Then, the groom-to-be - one of my favourite men in the entire world - said something that set me off in ways I can’t really explain.
“We’re not going to get stressed.”
Yep, that’s it. My reaction felt completely illogical and drastically unfair but it was undeniable: I was infuriatingly triggered.
The problem was that at the time I couldn’t quite work out why.
But now, after considerable reflection, I think I’ve been able to put my finger on it.
It was just over three years ago that I was in their exact position looking ahead at my own wedding.
I remember how glorious the love bubble felt and how incredible it was to finally be able to officially begin organising the best day of my life.
I made the decision very early on that I too was not going to get stressed.
I believed stress was controllable and I was ready to control it.
So, as friends and family began to come at me and my fiancé with often very helpful advice, I got into the habit of shutting them down with one little sentence, “we aren’t stressed”.