Why was it, I thought, that it was deemed superficial for a woman to have breast implants, but not breast reductions?
I found myself acting as a kind of spokesperson to my audience of one (my dog) on behalf of large-breasted women. He (my dog) knows better than anyone how often my short arms just don’t reach around my enormous bosom. “This is no way to live!” I cried out to him as he rolled over for a belly rub, knowing that if I were to bend down I might just topple clean over.
“What makes it different, Rupert?” I asked him. But he had no answers, so I asked my friends instead.
“You’re not superficial,” I said with authority as we sat down to a roast dinner. “Having a breast reduction is different, it’s a health issue.”
“Maybe not,” they said.
Kate Evans is a Melbourne-based Account Director and former top-heavy chick. In her early 20s she chose to throw out her E-cup bras and move in some dainty new B-cups.
“I did have a sore back and medical problems, and I struggled to find the right bra, but at the end of the day I wouldn’t have died if I didn’t have the surgery,” she told me, without the breathlessness that often comes with having three kilos of breast tissue on your chest. “It was more superficial than medical for me and I’m happy to admit that.”
Happy to admit to being superficial? I almost choked on my honeyed carrots.