The Twins recap The Bachelor: The most cringeworthy first kiss we've ever seen.

The women have been stuck in a mansion together for less than 24 hours and Cat has already decided that Cayla T doesn’t deserve to be here for reasons that are entirely unclear.

Cool.

But none of that matters, because when Osher arrives, we're met with a far bigger problem.

Look, there's been an issue bubbling away for quite a while now, and we haven't wanted to say anything.

Obviously Osher is a national hero, and there's no one else we'd ever want to take over the role of helping absurdly attractive people with lots of Instagram followers find love. That's his thing.

We unpack the best moments from the Honey Badger's first week on our Bach Chat podcast. Post continues after audio.

But in the last few seasons, the contestants have started to... objectify Osher. As some kind of Bachelor novelty. They get far too excited by his presence and make him into a spectacle of his own.

Osher, however, isn't here for your entertainment. He's also not here for your eyes because he already has an Audrey. So pls let him do his job of putting the date card on the table, giving it an enthusiastic double tap, and then getting back to hanging out with his new best friend Honey Badger. He has nonsensical games to set up and candles to light so don't hassle him.

One of the blonde ones who looks like Sam Frost is given the single date, and surprisingly she is both nervous and excited.

Another woman comments that she's surprised because 'Shaz' doesn't seem like Nick's type which is confusing because a) there is no one named Shaz on the show, and b) YOU MET HIM LITERALLY YESTERDAY HOW DO YOU KNOW HIS TYPE?

It turns out Nick is taking Shannon in a helicopter, despite the fact she's pathologically afraid of heights and planes.

"I've watched too many of the plane movies," she tries to joke. "You know, the crash, investigation."

Shannon, we believe you mean Air Crash Investigation. But you're obviously in very safe hands.

It becomes clear, however, that the plan is to throw both Shannon and Nick from the helicopter directly into the water and have them swim to their destination. It would appear someone lacked the foresight to consider a place to land and we're not saying it was Osher but it most likely had something to do with Osher.

After an entirely unnecessary helicopter ride, Nick decides to cook Shannon salmon on the beach, but there's a PROBLEM.

Shannon doesn't like salmon and omg neither, it tastes like dirty ocean and... off.

She tries to eat it and gags because it's gross, and Nick starts telling a story about why he doesn't like coffee. The fact that this is one of the most interesting conversations we've heard in Bachelor history speaks volumes.

When they go for a swim, Shannon emerges from the water looking like this:

When we go for a swim, we similarly emerge from the water looking like this:

So it's relatable etc.

Back at the mansion, a date card has appeared, and Osher is nowhere to be seen. Frankly, he was sick of being objectified by a group of scary women so has made alternative arrangements for the delivery of date cards until further notice.

Two women who we believe in our hearts were never mic-ed go home.

UNTIL NEXT WEEK.

You can follow Clare and Jessie Stephens on Facebook, and join our Bachelor Lols Facebook group.

Catch up on all the recaps right here:

Ep 1: The Twins recap The Bachelor: The awkward incident that has two women fuming.