The I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here producers must be sitting back feeling pretty smug right about now. Lisa and David Oldfield have been in the African jungle approximately 48 hours and they’ve already given fellow contestants the urge to pull their own hair out.
Tuesday night it was royal expert and Princess Diana’s former butler, Paul Burrell, who found himself wondering how he’d been bullied into submission over his opinion on, of all things, circumcision.
The debate – which is perhaps the wrong word because it implies the Briton got a word in – started when Paul inquired about the couple’s sons and how old they were, when the pair starred in The Real Housewives of Sydney.
Listen: For more brutal honesty from the hilarious Lisa Oldfield, here’s her chat with Mia on No Filter. (Post continues.)
Lisa then shared an anecdote about her eldest son Harry coming home thinking he was Jewish because he’d been circumcised, leading Paul to ask why they made the decision.
“It is cleaner. It looks better. It functions better in the sense of sexually transmitted diseases,” David launched in, before rattling off a bunch of statistics.
“Bloody oath, we had the boys circumcised.”
David said he actually watched the procedure being performed on both Harry, now eight, and Burt, now five, as babies.
“The greatest pain was getting the injection for the anaesthetic. The rest of was as if they were crying because they were changing the nappy.”
Paul didn’t want to be drawn into an argument suggesting, “that’s what you believe. Other people believe differently.”
But David didn’t want to let it be, countering, “It’s not what I believe. All of the medical science shows that categorically. Google it when you get home.”
Watch: In a Lift with Lisa Oldfield. (Post continues.)
Paul started to suggest why shouldn’t children be given the opportunity to decide for themselves if they’d like a piece of their anatomy removed, but David dismissed this as “nonsense”.
When Paul opened his mouth to say foreskins are a “God given” thing males are born with, he was cut off again.
“It’s a God given thing. The chosen people always take them off as a matter of course. How would you argue with them?”
Indeed, Paul struggled to argue, except for wondering why men’s nipples don’t get cut off as well if they’re just as pointless, which somehow led to David asking Paul if he’d get an infected appendix taken out… and we’re sorry, we’re lost.
Later, Paul, while reflecting on the bizarre conversation, concluded David was “rude and obnoxious,” which his campmates seemed to agree with.
Meanwhile, in private Lisa told David she was not happy Paul had judged their parenting, also giving us one of our favourite quotes of the 2018 season so far: “It is our kids’ penises, what’s he worried about? Is he the penis police?”
Lisa wasn’t done being pissed off, getting personal by saying Paul was only famous because of a “dead princess.” Ouch.
We can’t wait for round two.