When I was 17, I had a conversation with my brother while we hung out in my room. I told him I didn’t want kids.
"What? Why not?" he asked. He sounded disappointed. Not in a rude way that people might ask me now that I’m 37, but more in an "it would be cool to be an uncle" type of way.
At that time, I felt suffocated in my house with my strict parents sucking the fun out of my life. The thought of freedom and university and career thrilled me. I saw how my mum gave up her artwork to be with us, and I just didn’t want to sacrifice anything for my passions.
Watch: Things people who don't want kids always hear. Post continues below.
Of course, at the time, I didn’t know that there might be other options for parenting. Plenty of women have a full career and raise children, and I fully support that lifestyle.
But I still don’t want kids.
Though, I did for a little bit. While I was married, I gave in to my husband’s desire to have children. Like I did with most things in our relationship, I convinced myself that I wanted kids because if I did, our marriage would be secure. But I was scared, as most mums are. Would I be ready? Would I be a good mum? What if they become a drug addict? What if what if what if...
But I was most concerned about sleep. Would I ever sleep again?
I’ve heard loads of parents talk about how tired they are, especially those first few years with kids. And of course they are! Raising a new person is not easy. Even "good" babies teethe and don’t sleep well all the time (and probably so much more I don’t know about).
I know pregnancy can change sleep patterns and the amount of sleep you need. But I’m just not willing to take that risk.
Writing and reading are my passions. But if I had to choose between writing and reading or going to sleep, you’ll find me under my covers anytime between 10pm and 6.30am on weekdays. But you’ll actually find me in bed by 9.45pm.