'This 5-second relationship hack keeps my long-term relationship alive.'

Sometimes long-term relationships can feel like a bit of a slog. The things that were rather adorable at the start of the courtship manage to irrationally irritate you. It can be a challenge going from sorting the logistics like kid pickups and who is putting out the bins to then jumping each other's bones in the bedroom.

When we are falling in love, there is an endorphin increase that literally makes our palms sweat, our cheeks flush and our hearts pitter-patter. It can feel impossible to keep your mitts off each other and you truly believe you will feel like that forever. Then our bodies get used to the pleasure stimulants and the overwhelming initial intensity of all those feelings fade. Whatta bugger. That is when the effort and work in a relationship really need to kick in.

My partner and I always have the grand intentions of doing weekly date nights, we even chat about just taking a stroll together without the kids. We end up doing this once and then life gets in the way and it's the first thing to be scrapped from the calendar. Why oh why do we put our most beloved to the end of the line? I remember Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman saying how they tell their kids they love each other the most; they said it makes the kids feel safe that their security blanket is thick as thieves. I like this idea in principle but saying it and acting it are two different things.

Watch: What really happens to couples after kids? Post continues after video.

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I was chatting about this with my psychologist, about how even though there is still an abundance of love between my partner and me, finding the time to actually spend together is tough. When we do manage to squeeze that offspring-free hour in, there is that pressure to connect, connect, connect cause who the hell knows when the next opportunity will come?

She reassured me promptly that I was not alone, finding time and expecting connection while watching the clock tick is total horse sh*t. The advice she followed with was to incorporate little five-second 'love taps' into your day. I was all ears, I could swindle five seconds, and maybe on a generous day, I could even swing 10. 

Now stay with me because although the tips I'm about to give you may make you screw up your nose, I have tried and tested a few of them and they actually do work. The aim of the game is to let your partner know you have been thinking of them. The little taps build up over time and a little connection seeps into your world.

So here they are:

  • Every time you walk past your partner in your house, touch them in some way. It's not a hug (they can take longer than five seconds and we ain't got that time) but a simple touch on the arm or back as you cross paths. I get it; it sounds exhausting but you actually don't walk past each other constantly. Even just do it when you remember, it's a little love tap and that minor physical connection can go a long way.
  • Reach over and touch them first thing in the morning before leaping for your phone. Just a hand on the shoulder or back, a simple little touch and then you can get onto TikTok.
  • Use their actual name on occasion. I'm extremely creative and use the word "babe" to refer to my partner, foul I know, judge away. So, for example, if he does something that I want to thank him for, instead of saying "Thanks babe", saying "Thanks Sam", makes it a little more meaningful.
  • My psych swears by this one and does it every night for her husband. When cleaning her teeth, she gets out her husband's toothbrush and pops some toothpaste on it for him. She said it was just a little love tap that made him know she’d been thinking about him. I haven't done this one yet and dare say I never will but I bet you think about it next time you are scrubbing your chompers.

I paid $200 bucks for these tips and the joke might well be on me, but we ain't got nothing to lose by giving them a crack. Go forward with connection lovebirds.

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