If you ask people what the most important thing is in a relationship, you’ll get a myriad of answers — big ones being trust, communication, respect, etc. — but all of the answers really tie back to one singular factor.
And it’s: Emotional stability and emotional self-sufficiency.
Without it, there effectively is no relationship. With it, everything else will naturally follow.
I’ve written about this before — in fact, “emotional stability” is number one on my own list, and one of only three things I absolutely need in a partner. Emotional stability is the sexiest thing you can do.
And I’m not alone in saying this — many people agree on this being the number one most important thing.
Single phobia is a real thing. eHarmony’s CEO told us how to fight it below. Post continues after video.
Mark Manson calls it “people who manage their insecurities well” or “the ability to see one’s own flaws and be accountable for them.”
Karen Salmansohn called it “good character values” — i.e., “not a psychopath” (and then includes a list of “psychopath” characteristics — thanks, Karen.)
Leo Babauta of Zen Habits uses the term “emotionally self-reliant,” saying, “We look for happiness from others, but this is an unreliable source of happiness… And here’s the thing: it’s not their job to fill our emotional needs.”