Growing up, my family was the type of family to let all sorts of people walk into our home and stay.
Sometimes for a few hours, sometimes for a few nights and sometimes... for much too long.
I've had some bizarre experiences, like the time my mother moved my sister and I out of the bedroom we shared and moved in four young women from church so they wouldn't be homeless. Sure, it was a beautiful sentiment, but sleeping head-to-toe with my mum wasn't exactly on my bucket list at 13 years old.
Essentially, what I'm getting to is... I know a lot about house guests. I've welcomed more than a few. I've also been one on several occasions. I've slept in the homes of some odd people and welcomed others just like them into my home.
And I've learned a lot of lessons.
How to act and how not to act. What is appropriate and what isn't. What actions will get you a slap on the wrist and which of them will leave you on the street.
Watch: Holiday mistakes that attract burglars. Post continues below.
So I thought what better way to flex my intelligence than to share with you everything I've learned.
Here are my top tips for being a good houseguest. Read thoroughly and heed my words.
1. HELP. OUT. AROUND. THE. HOUSE.
Pick up your socks. Wipe down the bench after eating. Do the thing that you know is right to do.
Obviously, how one is meant to act in someone else's home changes with every host. But there is a general standard of decorum that must be upheld, surely?