kids

Just a bunch of hilarious stories of kids throwing their parents under the bus.

Kids have no filters. It’s endearing, funny and occasionally very, very embarrassing.

It’s usually unintentional, but those tiny humans can very easily throw you under the bus at the worst of times.

Here’s just the funniest stories parents shared on Reddit about their kids selling them out:

Slave labour.

Oh… No.

“When I was younger, my parents used to take in foster children,” wrote Reddit user Heromann. “They would come, stay a month or two, and then leave. By the time I was 6 I was fairly used to it. Also, as a child, I absolutely hated doing chores. I would do anything to get out of it. One day when I was complaining my mother told me ‘The only reason we had you was to have you do chores for us’ in the kidding way that mothers use.

“Fast forward a few months, and we have a foster girl who’s around my age. She’s been there for a few weeks, and it’s fall so time to rake leaves. My parents send us out and we all start raking. Well one thing about the neighbourhood I lived in, everyone was pretty close. When we raked leaves all the parents had their kids do it at the same time and they would all sit together and drink and talk. Well the foster girl starts complaining about working. And so, loud enough for everyone to hear, I say ‘The only reason my parents are fostering you is so that you can do chores!’ Embarrassed parents had to explain that it was all in jest.”

The Dark Knight.

Reddit user Hezod shared this story and honestly, we have no words:

“When my son was four, and still showered with his Daddy he came downstairs, when my MIL was over and said “so, Gramma, did you know my daddy has a big thick penis? I hope I get a big thick penis too. I bet Batman has a big thick BLACK penis, because he only works in black.” Silence. Followed immediately by hysterical laughter when he concluded “and sometime very very dark grey.”

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Bloody embarrassing.

A now-deleted Reddit user took her four-year-old son to the bathroom with her during a supermarket run.

He “went running out of the toilet to announce to his grandma, and the rest of the supermarket, that ‘my mummy has a piece of string hanging out of her bum’.”

Supermarket dance.

Why is it always at the supermarket?

“My daughter decided to strip completely naked, nappy and all, in the shop when I had my back turned for about five seconds. I only became aware when a lovely lady tapped me on my shoulder and whispered into my ear, ‘Excuse me, love, your child is dancing naked beside the potatoes’,” she said.

‘I like your hat’.

“‘You’re a funny little man, but I like your hat.’ My 4-year-old said that to a little person in the airport who was wearing a cowboy hat. I practically wanted to keep walking and leave him there, then I heard the man respond, ‘Thank you. And you’re a funny little man too!’ He was great about it, and several of us ended up smiling instead of being mortified.”

Thank goodness that ended well.

Now don’t worry, we’re not done.

Here’s a bonus selection of photos because honestly, they are just hilarious.

My friends daughter had a school assignment to “Write once sentence about a family member and draw a picture about it”.

So glad I checked my 2nd grade daughter’s homework…not that I made her fix it or anything.

The reason my son´s teacher asked to talk to me

My kid’s drawing about her first day of kindergarten: her teacher. It’s pretty accurate. from r/funny

His dad is the best cock ever! from r/funny

My cousins first drawing of her Mum (she’s 5). from r/funny

Oh, god.

When has your child thrown you under the bus? Share your stories in a comment below.

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