fashion

Welcome to 2019: Asymmetric jeans are now a thing that precisely no one asked for.

 

In 2020, many people fear robots will be taking over our jobs.

In 2019, we fear the fashion industry have only scratched the surface when it comes to gloriously batsh*t clothing trends.

So let us welcome you to this year’s utter head-scratcher of a design: asymmetrical jeans.

The Jekyll & Hyde of denim wear.

There’s the straight side, for the leg that skipped leg day, and the flared side, for the leg that can leg press triple your own body weight.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

@sonya_soltes wearing asymmetric jeans from PF2019 collection ♨️ #kseniaschnaider #selfielookbook

A post shared by Ksenia Schnaider (@kseniaschnaider) on

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They’ll essentially make your legs look like a before and after shot (if you’re a body builder who’s striving for… giant disproportionate ankles).

They’ll also give the impression you’re the type of person who just can’t make your mind up, who spends hours scouring Netflix for a new show to watch but ultimately ends up watching Friends – again

You want to branch out, but you feel a strong sense of commitment to your usual jean of choice, whether it be straight or flared.

Well, you’re in luck. Someone at Ksenia Schnaider with a pair of scissors accidentally sewed two different pairs of jeans together and decided to roll with it. Or that little girl in the taco ad really spoke to them. Why can’t we have both, huh?

Por que nos los dos? Image: Instagram.
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They cost around $520, which is actually pretty good if you consider it as a sort of "two for the price of one" deal.

They're also also made-to-measure, which means you'll have the best fitting crooked jeans in all of the land. Rejoice!

AND if you're heading to a music festival, you can sneak a flask in under the flared side, all while pulling off the traditional skinny jeans look.

We bet that's exactly what they were designed for.

Here's what the people are saying:

The general consensus on Instagram was "Nah".
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Ahh, straight, simple and to the point. We like you, Chris.

But hey, while we admit they're not exactly everyone's cuppa, if you're one of those chic androgynous cool girls who can pull of sports bras as tops and goat feet shoes, you've probably already got a pair and they probably look fire as hell.

The rest of us will be out here in our regular, symmetrical jeans, storing our flasks down our bras like grandmas, while the fashion world's elite clip-clop away in their goat shoes with their robot assistants and hoverboards.

Or whatever.