I know you're not meant to say this out loud. But f**k it.
I wish I lost my job in the global pandemic.
No seriously. Why didn't I. Or now. Can someone make me redundant now. I don't need a package or a payout or anything. It's fine. Just fire me and let me escape to the countryside. None of my clients even have any work because it turns out that acting in shit movies filmed on the other side of the world is not an essential service, lol.
But, up until a week ago, there was one client who had a bit of work. Armie Hammer was doing some movie with Jennifer Lopez. Can't remember what it was called. I didn't read the email properly. Sounded boring. I was pretty excited to meet J-Lo though. I like that song she sings about 'Love Don't Cost A Thing'. Anyway, I thought 'Oh, good for him. I'll take my 10 per cent and maybe we can finish the bathroom reno.'
But we shan't ever be finishing the bathroom reno.
Whenever I tell people I represent Armie, they say, 'Who?' and I say 'The guy from Call Me By Your Name' and their eyes light up and they shout, 'TIMOTHEE CHALAMET' and I say 'Nah, the other one' and they either nod or say 'Can't picture him' and then I mutter '...Winklevoss twins' and by that point they're not really listening anymore.
Point is, you'd know his face.
Anyway. My year started off pretty well. I wrote down all my goals, aspirations but also my intentions for 2021. I wrote '2021 IS MY YEAR' and then my husband caught me doing yoga in the lounge room and I said, with a confident grin on my face, "New year new me" and then I got into Shavasana and repeated my mantra in silence.