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Just 7 bizarre things we noticed about Melania Trump's 2019 White House Christmas decor.

While Donald Trump has been tapping away on Twitter about his own impeachment hearing, Melania has been busy transforming the White House into the temporary Christmas floor in a department store.

And if we’re using last year’s Handmaid’s Tale-inspired red trees as the bar in which to measure this year’s decorations against, Melania has well and truly nailed it.

The lights are pretty, there’s fake snow, and most noticeably the trees look like actual Christmas trees and not like Elisabeth Moss without her handmaid’s wings.

See, it’s pretty. Just don’t watch it 12 times. Post continues below video.

Video via White House

But then if you watch the video shared by the FLOTUS more than once, you start to wonder… things.

Weird things, like:

Does Melania Trump own ‘house clothes’?

Sure, she’s appearing in a professional video to be seen around the world but… that’s not what we look like at home.

white house christmas decorations
No. Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.
white house christmas decorations
Absolutely not. Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.
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Swap the heels for ugg boots, chuck on some trackies and switch out the coat (which she didn't fully commit to, anyway, maybe because the White House has... heating) for an oversized hoodie with pasta stains.

We think maybe someone forgot to wrap the presents and instead used them as... decor.

white house christmas decorations
They are not... baubles. Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

How are we supposed to enjoy a game of monopoly when the dice is being used as a decoration?

And that's not even the weirdest part. During research (a.k.a... stalking Twitter and Googling the Washington DC weather forecast) for this article, I discovered that Melania's decision to decorate a tree with games has pleased a deep, dark, far-right conspiracy-theory loving corner of the internet.

Because, of course it has.

See this innocent wee domino?

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white house christmas decorations
-_- Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

The dots add up to 17 (I counted, twice), and because the 17th letter of the alphabet is Q, QAnon reckon any use of the number is a nod to them, or something. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

According to Travis View, who has studied the QAnon phenomenon and written about it extensively for The Washington Post, the essence of the conspiracy theory is that:

"There is a worldwide cabal of Satan-worshiping pedophiles who rule the world, essentially, and they control everything. They control politicians, and they control the media. They control Hollywood, and they cover up their existence, essentially. And they would have continued ruling the world, were it not for the election of President Donald Trump, who was elected to put a stop to them."

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I wish I was making this up. That probably means QAnoners are the happiest of us all about these decorations because...

Is it just us, or is this lacking... joy?

The closest thing we see to happiness in this video is this duck, who looks pleased that it is under its umbrella.

white house christmas decorations
You are content and that's nice. Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

It's the silly season, so where is the silliness?

Last year's decorations were released alongside a portrait that showed Melania smiling (okay, more like 'smizing') as she wandered around her decorated rooms. This year... we got this:

white house christmas decorations
Bye, I guess. Image: The White House.
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But Melania, don't go! Overall we actually really like these!

Are these (presumably) lovely people okay?

What you are looking at here is Melania Trump examining gingerbread versions of the White House and other American landmarks:

white house christmas decorations
Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

That's nice.

But then, second time around, that's when you notice them.

white house christmas decorations
THEM. Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

According to the White House's official statement, the White House pastry team "constructed this masterpiece out of 200 lbs. of gingerbread dough, 125 lbs. of pastillage dough, 35 lbs. of chocolate, and 25 lbs. of royal icing".

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We are only assuming those two semi-terrifying figures are that team, based on their chef-like appearance. And if so, we think their second-long cameo is... insulting.

Either, we must dedicate the entire video to these gingerbread wizards, or we must let them... leave. They've been baking gingerbread for three months. They have sleep to catch up on and families to see, pls.

We really liked how Melania helped with the final touches.

The White House decorations were put together by more than 225 volunteers who flew in from across the United States to help over Thanksgiving weekend.

They did a wonderful job, but obviously didn't quite meet their deadline.

No worries though because as the video shows, FLOTUS didn't mind helping to complete all the final little tasks.

white house christmas decorations 2019
Here she is... salting(?) the tree. Image: Twitter/FLOTUS.
white house christmas decorations 2019
And fluffing a flower. Image: Twitter/FLOTUS.
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white house christmas decorations 2019
And phewf, finally the gingerbread White House is complete. Image: Twitter/FLOTUS.

Goodness. That was lucky.

Can someone explain these? Please.

I don't know much about plants but isn't this part supposed to be... underground?

white house christmas decorations
Are they... onions? Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

And it is absolutely crucial that we stop and ponder their placement for a moment, thank you very much.

white house christmas decorations
It looks like this tree has spiky hair and we like it very much. Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.
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Will these roses last until Valentine's Day?

white house christmas decorations
~ROMANCE~ Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

Recycling is not super high on the Trumps' agenda, we know. But it would be a travesty for this outrageously large display of roses not to be used to frame an awkward, uncomfortable photo of POTUS and FLOTUS (or fake Melania, if the real one isn't keen) on February 14. We don't want to see that, but we actually really do.

Overall, the reaction to this year's WH decorations is far more positive than last year. By that, I mean there's not yet been a meme comparing the decor to a scene from The Shining or the image of dystopian sex slaves.

Praise be, and happy holidays, everybody.

Feature Image: Twitter/@FLOTUS.

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