
Ivan’s controlling behaviour has been the main point of controversy surrounding this season of Bachelor in Paradise.
It highlighted a level of perceived danger viewers hadn’t seen on the series before.
Watching Ivan resort to punching walls, threatening other men, and referring to Tenille as “his property”, rang alarm bells across Australia.
And that was just to the viewers at home.
Imagine being on the receiving end of such behaviour, and not even knowing the full extent of it.
Tenille – while aware Ivan was a little clingy, maybe even slightly obsessed with her – told Mamamia she had no idea just how bad it was during her time in Fiji, and describes watching these unseen moments as confronting.
Australia watched on uncomfortably as she tried to tell Ivan he needed to be less possessive and “pull back the reigns a little bit”.
But instead of listening to her, Ivan, 29, playfully tried to hold her hand and kiss her.
Watch Tenille breaking up with Ivan on Bachelor in Paradise. Post continues after video.
“The biggest thing for me was just the over-affection and just being in my pocket and stuff… but the other stuff was intense. I was shocked. If I’d known about that I would have gotten out of there a lot quicker,” the 25-year-old told Mamamia.
While she was unaware of Ivan’s temper – him violently punching a wall during the show, she says she always felt safe in Fiji under the watchful eye of producers.
“I never felt physically threatened by Ivan whatsoever, but the producers were always pulling me aside to say ‘We’re always around, if you ever feel uncomfortable in a situation let us know,’ and prior to going in to conversations with him the producers would always say ‘If you ever need us to step in let us know, come and talk to us, we’re right here and we can get you out of there’.”
Now, she wants Australia to know she would never stand for this sort of behaviour.
Top Comments
Oh Tenille, are you listening to yourself? You had producers repeatedly warning you that you could ask for help if you felt uncomfortable. You still have to be “cautious” and “very careful” around him and manage his feelings for him, he just cares “too much”... and all this after knowing you for, what, a week? If he’s having a hard time, I’m sorry, but that’s up to him to deal with. These shows always go on about having support and aftercare, he needs to take advantage of that or find his own therapist. If you were my sister or best friend, I’d be suggesting you end contact with him, at least until he’d had some help.
I hate that everyone keeps saying that Ivan "cares too much". That's rubbish. If he cared, he would listen to her and respect her feelings!
Me too, it’s the same excuse used by every abuser. ‘I had to hit you, it made me so mad when you said that other guy was hot cause I love you so much’ or ‘I only killed her because I couldn’t bear the idea of her leaving me’. His emotions were his to deal with, there’s no excuse for taking them out on anyone else and I hate how people are validating his reactions