By JACQUI VAN AANHOLT
I will premise this story with an admission… Yes, I am competitive and yes I want to get married one day.
I’ve had my fair share of weddings over the past year and due to the frequency of said events, I have made a sport of beating out packs of single ladies to catch the bouquet.
As I said, I want to get engaged and married soon however I am wondering if my success rate is beginning to upset people, make me look a tad desperate and put undue pressure on the love of my life.
The first catch, at my brother’s wedding nearly 12 months ago, saw me beat the only other person truly up for the challenge – my new sister-in-law’s grandmother – who is in her 80’s. Let’s face it, if she truly wanted to be married, she would have entered the bouquet-catching tournament a whole lot earlier.
My rather athletic leap may or may not have also seen my sister-in-law’s three-year-old niece accidentally fall to the floor – she did that on her own, promise.
The next time round was also a bit of a joke, competition-wise.
I rugby tackled a close friend mid-air (it would have made the Wallabies proud) and tried to steal the thing.
We ultimately agreed to split the squished bunch of beautiful white orchids.
Later in the night, we split it again and four of us – all waiting for proposals and keen for them to be soon – wandered around with the now wilting flowers, giving me hope I’m not the only one out there in this dilemma… surely?
The most recent “classic catch” was just that and came at one of my best friend’s weddings. ‘Single Ladies’ blared from the speakers, the lights went dim and the bar was set as my vertically-challenged friend dragged a chair onto the floor, seeking the best bouquet-grabbing vantage point.
Then, something came over me – the devil on my shoulder said…’Third time lucky’… and it was on!
The time of the toss came and I’m ashamed to admit some playful shoulder nudging… okay charging… ensued.
As though in slow motion, the flowers hit the air, eyes blinded by the light, and even before I think I knew what was really happening I was a streak of yellow shooting through the air.