If you have had an orgasm in your sleep, according to researchers at the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction, you’re one of the lucky 37 per cent of women who are able to climax while snoozing.
If you haven’t been blessed with a Big O during a big sleep, you may be in luck – the study found that one in three women experience sleep orgasms by the time they turn 45.
So what does it feel like? How do you make one happen? Experts say two simple steps – a deep REM sleep and a sex drought are the best ways to prompt your body to reward you with a climax in the land of nod.
But there are a few extra tips you can have up your sleeve, according to some of the ladies in the Mamamia office, and those who’ve shared their experiences of sleepy time climaxes on Reddit.
“I have them when I’m stressed.”
“I was really late on the orgasm front. I started having sex very young, just 14, and while it was pleasurable, I couldn’t climax until I was 21, through sex or masturbation. However I started having sleep orgasms about once a month from the age of 12 or 13.
I’d wake up having what I thought was a seizure – the spasms were so strong and violent it almost hurt. I actually didn’t look forward to them! I wasn’t until I had my first ever orgasm through masturbation that I was like, “Oh my god, that’s what that was!”
I still have sleep orgasms a few times a year and it's always a nice surprise. For me, the only way they will come on is during a stress dream. The dreams have zero to do with sex, and never have. In the dream I will be doing things like running late for work, struggling to make a phone call, or, disturbingly, arguing with a relative. As the stress reaches it's peak, so do I. Occasionally, I wake up on the verge and have to quickly finish myself off, usually a quick rub in that general area works fine.
I find that having 'sexy thoughts' before bed and or masturbating without climaxing brings them on, as does going a few weeks without masturbating. It's kind of worth it, as the orgasms I have in my sleep are far stronger than any I've had awake".
"I have them when I sleep in."
"I don't get these sleep orgasms often, probably only about 3 - 4 times a year. I got my first one a couple of years ago after becoming sexually active. As far as I know, they always happen in the morning if I'm sleeping late on a Saturday or Sunday and I'm in a dreamlike state where I'm half asleep half awake.
I know that I'm partially asleep but I also have a sense of what's around me as well. I've never woken up masturbating, generally just laying on my back. Whenever they do occur, I'm usually having some sort of dream about having sex."
"I've had two in a night."
"I can't remember when I had my first one, it was when I was pretty damn young. I do have trouble reaching orgasms during sex, which is what makes these so frustrating to me because they come extremely easily during my sleep. I'm not sure how frequently I have them. I'd say once every other week. I generally don't have very sexual dreams, but pretty much every time my dream turns sexual I have one. I've had two in one night before.
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I am generally in the dream state when they start, and wake up either halfway through or right after they finish. They're VERY strong. I don't wake up masturbating, I only start masturbating if I wake up halfway through it to 'rub it all out.'
I've been laying on my back, legs spread, no stimulation on my clit, and gotten one of these... Again, hence my frustration that it's so hard for me to orgasm when I'm getting actual stimulation".
"I only have them when I nap".
"I often have them during afternoon naps, around 3-4 in the afternoon. Never at any other time. Sometimes my dreams are sexual and sometimes they aren't. If I wake up without having an orgasm, I am incredibly turned on and have to finish myself off.
I wouldn't say the orgasms are more intense than waking ones, but they are very intense, yes, and of a different "quality" than waking ones, maybe because there's no clitoral stimulation which I usually need to get off otherwise.
I suspect in my case, it has something to do with hormone levels during the afternoon and during sleep. My body becomes aroused, and it has nothing to do with what I'm thinking about. Sometimes my dreams incorporate this physical sensation by becoming sexual."
"I have them during kinky dreams."
"I have them all the time, normally once or twice per week. It's accompanied by a sexually deviant dream. For instance in my dream I start having sex with a hairy, nasty old man, or I start having sex with someone on a crowded street, or I'm having sex with a younger person etc. The orgasms are far more intense than any I have in waking life."
"I have them when I avoid sex before bed."
"My first was at 13. The dream was sexual - well, as sexual as they got when I was 13 - making out with a guy I liked. Then I didn't have another for a long time. I think I was 24 or 25 when the next one happened.
I have about one a month, but it varies. Sometimes I'll have several in a week, and at other times I'll go months between. I am always dreaming when it happens, and the dreams are always at least somewhat sexual. They also seem slightly more likely to happen if I was thinking about sex before I went to bed, but didn't have sex within 4 or 5 hours of going to sleep.
"They always wake me up. Sometimes it's obvious I was actually touching myself when I wake, but often, it seems like I wasn't. (Hands above my head, or under my pillows, or wrapped around my bf, etc. They do seem to be more intense."