I’ve been a sole parent for a decade and trust me, the hardest part about it is not the solo parenting itself – because you deal with it out of necessity like everyone else – but the guilt.
You know what I mean: the pit-of-your-stomach, constant feeling of failing your kids.
Most of us accept some guilt in parenting, but when you’re a single parent, it’s escalated as part of the unique mental load we carry: am I doing enough? Will I ever be enough? What more should I be doing?
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I know this is a single parent’s biggest fear – that we will never be able to give our kids what two adults in the home may be able to.
And because we’re worried about that, we’re forever trying to make up for it. Even though we know the kids are better off in a home where one parent is happy, rather than two miserable parents, we put so much pressure on ourselves because somehow, we still feel we’re not enough.
IT. IS. EXHAUSTING. An emotional and physical load not designed to be borne by just one person; and yet the Voices in My Head never let me have a break.
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Visual representation of how I feel on the inside on day #712 of isolation: the equivalent of the morning after a 4am bedtime post Melbourne Cup in 2017. Disgusted with myself after no self control, desperate for an adult to look after me, desperate for nourishment, still wearing yesterday’s make up, and still taking photos. ????????