“Bzzzzzt. WHAT’S THAT NOISE? And why has it interrupted the dream you were having about telling Chris Hemsworth to unpack the dishwasher, but in a sexy way?”
Because it’s one of the most relatable things that any parent of a school-aged child has ever read.
The author is a mum of one “big kid” and one “little kid”, and goes on to detail the frustration and repetitiveness of the typical process it takes to get her kids to school.
The morning begins with Spargo-Ryan’s partner leaving for work “before anyone else has a chance to wake up and ask for anything.”
So it’s up to the mum to sort out the kids.
The “big kid” won’t get out of bed – and his face is glued to his phone. The “little kid” screams when she tries to detangle her hair.
There’s cat poo on the kitchen floor but as is typical in any family household, there’s no paper towel when you need it.
And of course – no coffee. Spargo-Ryan dryly observes about the broken coffee machine that’s been untouched for three weeks, “how sad it is that they outlawed partners from calling coffee machine repair people.”
MMOL discuss School Runs Aren’t All They’re Cracked Up To Be. Post continues after…
As all parents know, it wouldn’t be a school morning without some yelling – from mum, the kids, and also Karl Stefanovic. Then there’s the political minefield of lunch boxes to address.
The sibling bickering only intensifies in the car after the act of leaving the house has been achieved. And finally, the issue that always pushes parents over the edge – the last minute project/costume/plate to share.