It’s well known that from a young age we’re unintentionally conditioned to think and act in certain ways.
Psychologists will often tell us the root of all our problems is our upbringing, the way in which our parents and other family members interacted with us and the values they raised us with.
A truer observation could not be made about my own upbringing.
There are lifestyle changes you can make to help alleviate anxiety. Post continues are video.
I love Mum, but there are traits she has passed down to me that I’d rather live without. Putting aside my thin hair and my ability to yoyo-diet like it’s going out of style, I’ve also been “blessed” with her anxiety.
It was something I didn’t realise I suffered from until a few years ago and it wasn’t until last year that I was told in kinder words than this, “it’s you mother’s fault you have anxiety.”
It’s obviously not all her fault. The situations I find myself in and a range of other factors also contribute, but I can’t help but notice that it’s her voice in the back of my mind that is constantly telling me to worry about what others would deem as “nothing”.
As a child, if I fell over and grazed my knee, I was told I should have known better. As a teenager I had to choose my friends “wisely” because the wrong friend could lead me down the wrong path and then what would my life become?
At university my mother’s catchphrase was “you never know what can happen”, but not in an exciting “grab every opportunity” kind of way, more like, you could cross the road and get hit by a car, kind of way.
It came alongside other phrases like, “you’re not studying enough,” “you’re not being social enough,” “you’re being too social,” “you’re not picking up enough shifts at work”.
As an adult I get told by my mum, “you don’t visit your mother enough, don’t you feel guilty?” and if that doesn’t work she’ll say something like, “it’s fine, don’t worry about visiting me, just wait until I get old and die.”