real life

14 of the most bizarre ways people have found out their partner is cheating.

The emotional turmoil that comes with being cheated on is a mighty beast

Whether a relationship went on for a few months or a few years, finding out about infidelity is a specific type of pain. 

And it's never easy. But it doesn't always have to be a sad situation or a bitter memory forever, but rather a great big lesson.

Watch: The science of cheating. Post continues after video. 

Video via Mamamia.

Unfortunately, cheating on a partner seems to be more of a common theme in relationships than it should be. As such, we reached out to our wider Mamamia community to share their own stories.

Without further ado, here are the 14 most bizarre ways people found out their partner was cheating on them.

'My daughter read his text messages.'

"I had no idea my husband was sleeping with a woman at church until I heard blood-curdling screams after one Sunday service. We'd arrived home and I'd been cleaning out the car when I heard my daughter on the other side of the house. I was by her side in less than 20 seconds but my husband was already there and he was holding my daughter while she sobbed. I was confused, concerned and terrified. Eventually, my daughter belted out, 'You are having sex with [Church Woman]?'

"It then came out that they'd been sleeping together for about nine months, were deeply in love and deeply unhappy in their marriages. My husband and I divorced a few months later and split custody of our daughter. She and her father have done a lot of hard work to get back to a good place. Don't hold any hard feelings against my husband. It's been almost a decade since it happened and he's with the woman he had an affair with, and I am also happy in a relationship."


— Natalie.* 

'Curiosity led me to check her phone.'

"Trusting my instincts, I noticed my partner forming friendships with colleagues at the fire station (where she worked) across from my workplace, sharing lunch with them daily. When confronted, she denied it, but my suspicions lingered. To test the waters, I suggested having lunch together, and she claimed to be busy. However, a quick location check contradicted her statement.

"Months later, during a playdate for a potential foster-to-adopt situation, curiosity led me to check her phone. The shocking discovery unfolded — evidence of four emotional affairs and one affair involving both emotions and physical intimacy, all spanning three years. This revelation hit me hard; I couldn't stop shaking. Despite the turmoil, I managed to keep my composure during the remaining hour of the playdate. It was undeniably one of the most challenging hours of my life."

— Alana.

'My doctor told me.'

"I was feeling sick so I went for a check-up and my doctor told me to get an STI check. I put my foot down and said no because I was in a monogamous relationship and had been for two years. She told me to do it anyway and begrudgingly, I did.

"Turned out I had chlamydia and another STI that contributed to my illness. I asked my partner point blank if he had cheated on me. He denied it and asked who was telling me all these lies. I told him, 'My doctor told me.' He started bawling like a baby! He had apparently 'accepted a hand job' from a friend giving him a massage. Big FAT lie, but it's the one he is sticking to. I wanted to marry that man. I planned to move in with him as well when my lease was up. Thankfully, our relationship ended before then."


— Daria.

'He told me himself to go get tested.'

"This story is truly nasty. My boyfriend of five years texted (Yup. TEXTED) to admit he cheated on me while he was on a work trip and he got chlamydia. He then told me I should probably go get tested."

— Claudia.

'He pocket-dialled me.'

"My cousin's boyfriend was a party boy with absolutely nothing going for him. I don't even know why she dated him, I guess she thought he was funny (he wasn't). On one occasion, he called her and when she answered, he didn't speak. 

"He had pocket-dialled her, and she could hear an awkward conversation between him and another woman. She then hung up and called him back and he didn't answer but texted her saying, 'Just having a nap.'

"She wrote, 'No you f**king aren't. You just pocket-dialled me. Answer your phone." So he called her and explained it was the neighbour because his dog got out. 

"Anyway, a couple of weeks passed and he went out for the night but he left his work phone at our place (where he was living RENT-FREE, mind you). She went through his phone and found out he was on a dating app, with a profile that said he was looking for 'couples who want him to join in' and then she went through his emails where he had booked an escort ON THE DAY HE POCKET-DIALLED HER. She got into his banking and saw the payment for $800.

"She texted him saying, 'I know what you did,' but because he was much too stupid to know how she figured it out, he texted a mate saying, 'She knows. Did you tell her?' My cousin could see EVERY message coming through on his work phone!"


— Lindsay.

'There was a red light camera speed ticket.'

"A family friend of mine found out from a red light camera speed ticket. The husband had a woman in the passenger seat of the car and literally got caught red-handed with her."

— Claire.

'He sent a message to the wrong person.

"In my late 20s, I had been in a four-year relationship with a guy. One New Year's Eve, he opted not to attend the same party and instead planned to go out with his workmates. We spoke on the phone at midnight, and I walked home.

"When I woke up at 6am, he wasn't in bed. Heading downstairs, I found him passed out on the couch. Attempting to move him to bed was unsuccessful, so I left water next to him and went back to bed. As I opened my phone, I discovered he had accidentally sent a message to a Facebook group chat I was part of, inquiring if a particular person was awake.

"I had a nagging feeling. I knew something was wrong, so with his laptop nearby, I delved into it, uncovering details about all the activities he had engaged in that night. Quite the revelation!"

— Lara.

'We are now divorced.'

"I was going through my fiancé's emails because he was in contact with our florist for our wedding in three weeks' time. In my search for said email, I found some rather concerning ones from an online chat. I opened the links and saw multiple flirty conversations with women asking to meet up. 

"He said his depression led him to act that way. I still went ahead with the wedding because I was young and stupid. We are now divorced."

— Kelly.

'He had a love bite on his neck.'

"While we were colleagues, [the guy I was later seeing] shared a story about a guy he knew who had love bites on his neck before going home.

"'Guys, what am I going to do? My Mrs is going to kill me,' the guy had asked his friends (including the guy telling me the story). The suggested solution was, 'Don't worry, just tell her we all held you down at work and gave them to you as a joke.' 

"Fast-forward to a couple of months before he and I got married (despite having ignored gut feelings and signs), my then-boyfriend returned home after a night out with a love bite on his neck. Laughing, he explained, 'Oh, it was just a joke at work.' (We were on different shifts by then.) 'The guys held me down and gave it to me as a prank!'"

— Danie.

'He asked to use our house for the weekend.'

"I'd split up with my boyfriend two weeks earlier and he'd moved out of our house. But on that weekend I was going to be away, so he asked if he could stay in the house as it was closer to town. I agreed.

"When I got back from my weekend, there was a girl's bracelet on the bedside table. I confronted him and he swore she was a girl he'd met that weekend – which was still pretty shit just two weeks after the end of a four-year relationship – but I had my suspicions it was going on way before that, and that's why there was so much distance between us."

— Nora.

'He had a stroke, and I had to contact his family.'

"My best friend's boyfriend came to visit her university dorm and had a stroke in her bedroom. She took him to hospital, and he was on life support, so she had to grab his mobile and contact his family. You know what she found? So many messages and nudes from other girls."

— Penelope.

'We found BOTH of our husbands' Ashley Madison profiles.'

"I was at my friend Nicole's house when our other friend, Jane, called us crying hysterically. She believed her husband was having an affair and was completely distraught. Nicole and I immediately sprung into action, determined to uncover the truth and support Jane.

"Frantically searching through our computers, we stumbled upon the Ashley Madison website, designed for married individuals seeking affairs. We found Jane's husband's profile, but to make matters worse, we also stumbled upon Nicole's husband and his private messages. Two marriages over in just 30 minutes — it was a night filled with lots of wine and tears."

— Olivia.

'He was flirting with my friends.' 

"I felt something was wrong, so I went ahead and checked his phone. Found lots of pictures from different girls and flirty message exchanges from so-called 'friends.'

"Oh, and he was on Ashley Madison! Honestly, it ended up being a good thing for me."

— Fiona. 

'He wanted a break, then moved in with her.'

"My ex-husband wanted a break from our marriage, a short one lasting six months, so he could figure things out in his life. I was curious if there was a possibility of someone else. I asked him directly, and he assured me there was no one else involved. Respectful of his request, I decided to move out of our house and stay with a friend.

"However, within a few days, I discovered that the woman he had denied existed was now spending nights with him. To my surprise, this individual not only existed but eventually moved in with my ex-husband."

— Nina.

*All names have been changed for privacy.

Feature Image: Getty.

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