This post has been written in specific reference to heterosexual love, in response to many young women who have contacted Tracey Cox for love advice.
1. Settling down with your first love isn’t as stupid as you think.
Many of the best relationships are those where couples got together early but also allowed each other to grow separately.
2. Life’s too short to waste on iffy/undecided men.
If he can’t decide if he wants in or out, he’s never going to be committed enough anyway.
3. Stop making excuses for men.
Adopt the “He’s just not that into you’ philosophy that says if he’s interested, he’ll be interested. Don’t kid yourself. Bad boys are mostly idiots who happen to be good looking enough to get away with bad behaviour. Fun to play with in your early 20s, so not worth the angst past this.
4. Nice guys aren’t boring.
Don’t mistake drama for love. Rollercoaster highs and lows aren’t passion, they’re a sign of incompatibility. Calm is good.
5. Jealousy won’t stop people cheating on you or leaving you, it encourages it.
Who wants to live with someone who’s suspicious of their every move? Constantly doubting how someone feels about you and saying ‘You don’t really mean that’ makes them doubt themselves. You’re craving insecurity but it’s your insecurity that will push them away.
The Three Things relationship theory. Post continues below.