The night I got asked to write this article I was lying in bed trying to get my child to go to sleep so that I could go and get laid.
I’d driven an hour and a half for this date, changed appointments around, sacrificed a much-needed nap, and washed my hair. This was not how I’d hoped it would go.
In my plan my child would go to bed at eight, I would then have three hours of hot sex and snuggling, and still get to sleep at a decent enough hour to wake up feeling refreshed the next morning. Of course, as usual, my optimism was completely misled.
Getting laid as a solo parent is SO much work.
There’s no ex to ship the kids off to every other weekend, so you’re completely reliant on friends and family to babysit. Most of my dates come from apps like Tinder, which is handy for people like me who don’t have the time to go out and meet people organically in bars. But you also don’t have the luxury of time (or of plentiful babysitters) to be able to meet these people for a casual coffee first, to suss them out and take it slow.
Usually, in order to optimise your precious child-free time, if it goes well you have to be prepared to cut straight to the chase the first time you meet. Then there’s the whole issue of where to…er… do the deed. If you live rurally, as I do, there’s no taxi to catch from the pub back to my place, and besides, personally I don’t like to invite new lovers into my child’s home. This means you either need to only date people who live near the pub (and who live alone) or you need to find a dodgy $40 a night Airbnb place around the corner from your babysitter’s house.