real life

A 99-year-old grandma was held hostage by a gunman. Got out of it like a pro nana.

Hello. We interrupt your typical Tuesday to bring you some kick arse news of kick arsery.

Doris Rucker Wasden is 99 years old and a resident of Salt Lake City, Utah. Like most 99-year-olds she is fantastically sassy. So much so that when an armed gunman tried to hold the grandma hostage on the weekend she wasn’t having a bar of it.

Let’s set the scene.

Glorious Doris heard some commotion in the house she shares with her granddaughter and her granddaughter’s fiancé, so got out of bed to check what was up. She soon returned because bed is love, bed is life, she’s been doing this whole ‘living’ thing for an entire century and is understandably exhausted etc.

It was then that a very strange man indeed (who now faces criminal charges) named Freddy Alexander Velasquez entered her bedroom with a gun, interrupting Doris’ quality time with her dog.

He then proceeded to hold her hostage for two hours. Rude.

Watch Doris recount the experience below. Post continues.

Video via Fox News

“I just got back in bed and he come in again and then he started to talk to me. And I said ‘I can’t hear you, I can’t hear you,’” Doris told Fox 13. “And then he realised I was a very old woman, so he was pretty nice to me after that.”

You see, Doris is about to celebrate her 100th birthday with a party next week. And she wasn’t about to have some 18-year-old dude named Freddy make a big old mess of her nice house, now was she?

“He was riffling through the drawers, making a mess, spilling things all over,” Doris’ future grandson-in-law Jim Gabbard told KSL News.

“And her words to him were, ‘I just had this house cleaned for my party and you are messing it up. You better knock it off.'”

Soon after, Freddy left Doris and her dog in peace. He was promptly arrested by waiting police.

“I never felt afraid of him. But I and the dog were a little shaky,” Doris told Fox 13.

Doris’ birthday party will go on as scheduled next weekend. Fingers crossed an armed gunman piñata is involved.

Honest or harsh? Grandma’s comment about her ‘stunning’ granddaughter might just be too honest.