Ironically, one of the most neglected areas in wedding planning is the actual wedding itself: the ceremony, where the magic happens.
For all the hullaballoo that we go through planning weddings, you’d be surprised at how many couples neglect to focus on the details of the ceremony, including wedding vows.
It can be daunting thinking about standing in front of a crowd of people, making declarations of love, especially for people who are introverted or aren’t that confident when it comes to public speaking.
But it doesn’t have to be challenging for you. With a little preparation and forethought, you can create an emotional ceremony that truly reflects who you are as a couple. Including humour and light-hearted moments will add a personal touch, too.
How to write wedding vows.
When it comes to the content of the ceremony, what you want to say to the person you are going to marry, it can sometimes be hard to put into words that you are comfortable saying in front of a large group of people. Some people may believe it’s just easier using a script because they are concerned with being overly emotional or getting caught up in their feels.
I think that’s a real shame.
What other time will we stand in front of the most special and important people in our lives and be truly honest about committing to another person, the person that we love and respect? The person that puts up with our shit and we put up with theirs.
I am probably the least smooshy person on the planet, and I was concerned with making our wedding ceremony soppy because that’s just not who we are as a couple. That’s not to say we didn’t add a bunch of romantic, personal and funny mementos of our love and relationship to our wedding ceremony. We avoided stock standard readings, and instead chose to include pieces by Woody Allen and Jerry Seinfeld that were both humorous and relevant to us.
The matter of incorporating faith and religion into your service might be a clear-cut decision for you. No matter who is working with you as a celebrant, minister or registrant, make sure you take the time to work with them to make your wedding vows as personal and intimate as possible. When it comes to religion and including religious aspects and details into your wedding service, do what is important to you, not what you feel obliged to do.
If your faith is a part of your life, great, include it in your wedding day. If you are an atheist but your parents want you to get married in a church, I encourage you to have that conversation early on. Perhaps this isn’t a big compromise for you, but more and more I am meeting couples who are stepping away from full religious services and adding snippets of tradition and readings into their ceremony.