For years jeans were happy just to be themselves – sure occasionally their legs would get a little tighter, their waists are little lower – but mostly, jeans knew who they were and what they were here for.
But now – like a man in his 50s who’s recently been through a divorce – jeans are experiencing a little mid-life crisis. They’ve bought a motorbike and their new look is seriously embarrassing their kids.
They're basically jeans with detachable legs that you can rip off whenever you feel the urge for jorts. And they have a gap between the jort part and the legs - leaving you with a frosty crotch during the colder months.
Since their release many concerned citizens have jumped on Twitter to reach out to jeans and offer their support.
— ♡Hev (@hevalldayy) May 18, 2017
When you see an outfit and think 'that looks like it could give you thrush...' https://t.co/DppJdPd73N
— lynne mccrossan (@lynnemccrossan) May 18, 2017
if this were a men's romper with detachable legs it would be some next-level shit https://t.co/2TFJOSp68D
— CLINCHPOOP (@gymstradamus) May 17, 2017
— C.P. (@CParks777) May 18, 2017
This is not the first time jeans have gone rogue this year. In January, Topshop released a pair of jeans with plastic knee windows, designed to help your knees people-watch, I assume.
he wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer.https://t.co/OICWceRKCO
— Jamie McKelvie (@McKelvie) March 13, 2017
And then they took it one step further, releasing a pair clear plastic jeans in April.
CLEAR PLASTIC JEANS ARE YOU FEELING OKAY TOPSHOP? pic.twitter.com/fRQcrhil70
— Angela (@theawkwardblog) April 21, 2017
Despite the concern from the public, so far jeans have not responded or agreed to participate in a worldwide intervention.
Jeans, if you're reading this, we're worried about you - please call home and tell us you're OK.