"It was one of my deepest, darkest secrets". Bachelor in Paradise's Rachael on her meltdown.

It was the moment that broke Bachelor In Paradise viewers’ hearts.

After finding herself unlucky in love once again, Rachael Gouvignon had a full-on emotional meltdown, and questioned why at 33, she was still single.

“It’s very important for me to find someone. I don’t know why it hasn’t happened for me yet,” she tearfully told a producer on the show.

“I know it’ll happen when I least expect it, but I’m tired of hearing that, I’ve heard it like, hundreds of times and I’m sick of hearing it!”

It was arguably the realest and most honest moment of the whole series, and something Rachael has since discovered a lot of other women can relate to.

“Everyone has been so nice. I think half the nation was crying,” she tells Mamamia.

“All the single women, 30 years old were crying. Lots and lots of people have said to me that they can relate, and it’s so nice to see real and raw emotions of people.”


Rachael says up until last night, it was one of her “deepest, darkest secrets”.

“I’ve got a younger sister who’s got a beautiful baby boy and a beautiful husband, and it’s nice going around to see them, but half the time, you’re thinking, ‘I wish it was me,'” she adds.

And she says a lot of women she knows feel the same way.

“They’re the conversations that I sit around and have with my girlfriends, who are also my age and still single. I’ve got so many incredibly beautiful friends that are all single still, and it’s just so weird,” she says.

“Fifteen years ago, everyone was getting married younger, and now women are getting older and older and older. It gets very lonely.”

Rachael thinks it all comes down to the fact we’re living in “such a fast-paced world” right now.

“They meet somebody and I feel like they don’t really take enough time getting to know somebody. It’s like, swipe left, swipe right, and that’s what I feel like what dating is like. It’s seeing three or four different people, without actually getting to the root of a person,” she says.


“People are quite impatient now, I feel.”

Rachael also thinks a lot of guys are too “scared” to even approach women now.

“I think deep down men would like to get into a relationship,” she says.

“There’s a lot of men who are older and have still not been married, so I feel like there’s a lot of fear in people these days. People aren’t as big risk takers as they were back then.”

Ultimately though, she says the pressure to be in a relationship is something she and a lot of other women put on themselves.


“In our society now, it’s kind of the norm not to be in a relationship when you’re in your 30’s. It’s normal. But it scares me what happens in 10, 15 years time,” she adds.

“Is it going to be 40? Is it going to be 50? I think there’s a fear of women our age, but it’s not so much spoken about. Maybe between your girlfriends and that’s it.”

Rachael says getting married and having kids is all part of the “timeline of life”. But it’s hard to keep moving forward when it feels like everything is suddenly at a standstill.

“You go to school, you go to university, you get your career, you get married and you have children. So when there’s a long period of time where you haven’t found that partner, it’s like, oh, gosh, how much longer do you have to wait? Because realistically, I can’t really have a baby at 50,” she adds.

LISTEN: Bach Chat In Paradise: Stop Melting Into Each Other! Post continues below.

But she acknowledges it’s not really something any of us have control over.

“You can’t really just sign a piece of paper and voila, you’ve got a partner. There’s a lot of elements to make sure you find the best person for you, because you’re going to be spending every day of your life with them,” she says.

“That’s why I haven’t rushed into anything either, because I want to make sure that person’s right for me in the long term. It’s an investment.”

And despite putting herself out there on national television, Rachael says she has no regrets about being so open and raw with her emotions, even though it was “definitely hard”.


“I was just being me. I’ve never set out to portray a particular image. I just go in being myself,” she says.

“I did reveal quite a bit more of myself last night, but from the responses, I think a lot of people can relate. And it’s good to know you’re not the only one who thinks like this!”

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