real life

Travel blogger Alexandra had a 'stalker' show up at her home in Bali. Now she's been forced to hide.

Content warning: This story includes mentions alleged of threats of sexual assault that may be distressing to some readers.

"You're never getting rid of me. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you. If that included kidnapping, so be it. I will come and shove you in my suitcase."

Imagine receiving this email from a male stranger who for the past year has been sending you hundreds of emails, social media messages and videos. 

For Alexandra Saper, this is her current reality.

It all began back in 2022, when she said someone was sending her inappropriate messages on Instagram and commenting on her posts. 31-year-old Alexandra is a content creator, travel blogger and empowerment coach who has over 100,000 followers on Instagram. As an influencer, she's well-versed in receiving comments from strangers online. But she says this man reached a whole new level of intimidation. So much so that she now deeply fears for her safety.

After blocking him on socials, he managed to find her email address, which she also blocked. But on Gmail, blocked emails funnel through to a Spam folder, meaning Alexandra was still receiving every message. 

And as the months passed, the "extreme amount of harassment" worsened. She said there were messages describing how he would kidnap her. Videos of him describing how he would sexually assault her. The different disguises he would wear to catch her off guard. 

As Alexandra tells Mamamia, with every correspondence (which she says totals in the high hundreds) her anxiety has crept up to the point of existential fear.


"The psychological toll is intense. It's a complete violation of your safe space. And that trauma will last a lifetime."

Watch: One woman shares her experience of being stalked. Post continues below.

Video via ITV.

For the past five years Alexandra has lived in Bali, originally from Arizona and later Washington DC in the US where she was practicing law. Being in Bali has been some of the best years of her life, she says.

"It felt like finding a place that finally fits me. The first time I went to Bali, it just clicked and felt like home."

But sometimes all it takes is one man to make a woman feel unsafe. And for Alexandra, she says this is what that man has done. 

Three months ago, she alleges he sent Alexandra an email informing her that he was coming to Bali. Then followed a photo of his flight confirmation four weeks ago. Next a week later, photos and videos of him in Bali – one even taken on her residential street.

She says these were paired with the following messages:

"I will come and shove you in my suitcase. Watch out for me."


"That's me [name retracted]. He plays games, he plays with fire, he creates scenarios, he can toy with people like there's no tomorrow."

"I am f**king furious. When I get my hands on you, I'm going to have to punish you in ways you can't even imagine. It's going to be so dark."

Alexandra says this whole ordeal has been terrifying. And emotionally debilitating as well.

"It's heartbreaking. I have been targeted by a deranged, delusional stalker, who has flown from across the world, threatening to find me, kidnap me, rape me, shove me in a suitcase, tie me up in his Bali villa, rape other women while forcing me to watch," she says. 

"I've never provoked him, never responded to him or met him or communicated with him. Yet his obsession and stalking has only intensified."

Earlier this month, Alexandra filed an official police report against the man with Balinese authorities. While she tells us that an investigation is ongoing, Alexandra feels completely vulnerable.


"I've done everything imaginable to push this through the legal system – both within Indonesia/Bali, and also the UK [where the alleged stalker is from]. I notified the UK and US embassies, I met with police chiefs, immigration officers and the US ambassador," she says. "I feel like I'm fighting to be heard."

But Alexandra tells Mamamia that he is yet to be reprimanded or arrested.

"My life has been totally turned upside down – I couldn't leave the house or go out in public. I even had to move into my friend's house. I was watching myself sink into depression, and I was waiting to hear progress reports from police, and nothing happened."

In the meantime, Alexandra had to make the tough call to leave her home in Bali. She is currently in a different undisclosed country. 

It's an impact on her income as well – unable to run her business as an influencer, content creator and coach, as that would require posting on social media and potentially revealing where she is. But she feels fortunate to have the time, resources and ability to advocate for herself – something other women in her position have told her they've been unable to do.


Alexandra said someone from her network was able to reportedly contact a family member of the stalker, who alleged that the 38-year-old man had done this to several women before. These fellow women remain terrified for their safety, Alexandra said.

"I want to stop this man. I know I'm not the first one, and I know I'm not going to be the last one. I hope that he's arrested, prosecuted and put away by UK authorities, and never allowed to return to Indonesia. Then I would feel safe to return to Bali and to live my life freely."

By going public with her story, Alexandra said she wants to make sure women who have experienced similar don't feel alone. And fortunately for Alexandra, she has an amazing support system in place.

"Getting the support of other women and my community has given me the strength to get through this. I feel like I'm not just fighting for my personal safety, but for the wider issue itself – because no woman should go through this," she says.

"I want my life back, my home, my peace, my freedom. I just feel deeply violated. Telling my story reminds me of my power, instead of feeling weak and wanting to hide."

If this has raised any issues for you, or if you just feel like you need to speak to someone, please call 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) – the national sexual assault, domestic and family violence counselling service.

Feature Image: Instagram @thewayfaress.