Why do I say “I need a wife”, when that’s not what I really mean?
I’ve just watched people comment on an article in which a woman describes her experience of motherhood.
It’s a good article. Writer, Ginger Gorman articulates how so many of us feel, bored with the drudgery of domesticity and frustrated at society’s expectations of women to juggle life and work while maintaining a happy face.
Straight out of the block in the comments, “we need more wives”. A comment I have made myself a million times. The kids are all up in my face, and the list of stuff that needs to be done seems too long to contemplate. “I need a wife.”
I write this article on a Sunday afternoon in a rare moment of quiet calm. Both my children are asleep. I survey my home. It is a disaster. The dishwasher broke on Friday night and the kitchen is a bomb site.
There is clean laundry waiting to be put away; not one load, but eight. Yes. Eight. I can’t remember the last time we mopped the floors. I gave the loos a cursory dunk with bleach a week ago but the shower hasn’t seen a scrubbing brush in longer than I care to think about.
Let’s talk about this: Every woman needs a wife. Discuss.
And, it’s a Sunday afternoon and the kids are both asleep. This seems the perfect opportunity to get on with it.
But I work during the week. It’s a job I adore, but I work hard and I work long hours.
My weekends are a haven to catch up on sleep, to see my husband and talk with him about something other than the daily logistics. To actually play with my children for longer than it takes to bath them.
I need my weekend for me too, to do something creative and fulfilling that isn’t work or child related. So, I’m not doing the chores, and truly, today I really could use a wife.