By NICKY CHAMP
Sure there are nappies, burp cloths (for the uninitiated, that’s fancy talk for a towel to wipe up baby vomit), bottles, sleep, a shower, a freezer full of lasagna (seriously, can no one think of a better meal?) etc. etc. but if you’re a new mother you will figure these things out fairly quickly, it’s the real life changes you need to know about.
1. A life bubble.
There’s one thing you should prepare yourself for before the baby comes – the rising panic that makes everything around you suddenly become dangerous, very dangerous.
As you navigate through your new life trying to do your best not to kill the baby, you’ll assume everyone else is trying to. Life is one big death trap and it’s your challenge to get out alive.
Just as an FYI, you should know that this post is sponsored by Wild Child Baby Organics. But all opinions expressed by the author are 100% authentic and written in her own words.
It begins at the hospital, friends and relatives will want to visit and touch your baby. You’ll view every new person as a threat and before handing over your offspring you’ll weigh up the germ risk in your head, ‘Are they the type of person who knows to sanitise their hands before coming into a maternity ward?’
Then once you leave the safety of the hospital it’s on; ‘Stop driving so fast!’ you’ll shout at your husband/life partner/baby daddy who is already driving 30 kms under the speed limit and geriatrics in Volvos are overtaking you. “Maniacs!” you’ll curse at them, wondering when the roads became more chaotic than downtown Mumbai.