There’s tone deaf and then there’s Lonnie Turner, the US man who asked the internet why his wife and mistress can’t coexist in peace.
The Texan businessman recently posted a picture of his two partners on Facebook with the caption, “These two better learn to get along. I work extremely hard and I deserve to have everything my little heart desires.
“Why have a cake and can’t eat it??? [sic] I want multiple cakes!!”
The father of two then concluded his little plea with the hashtags “wife”, “chic” and “best of both worlds”.
Funnily enough, Facebook users weren't particularly sympathetic to this sweet-toothed gentleman's needs. The post has attracted more than 600 shares and over 100 comments, most of which express outrage over his blatant lack of respect for his wife.
"I wonder how you'd feel if your mother was treated like this?" asked one commenter.
"Really Lonnie, your wife is SACRED. Your side piece is NOT," wrote another.
Some however, chose to admire his forthrightness.
"I don't agree with what Lonnie is doing, but at the same time we have to consenting adults who chose to be with him in this situation," posted one female defender. "People, man or woman, will treat you the way you allow them."
It will hardly shock you to learn Turner wasn't even the slightest bit shamed by the online outcry.
"Whatever makes me happy, I'm going to do it," he responded in the comments. "I will never conform to society's norms. I know some of the guys a few of you ladies are married to or are dating. I also know a few of their side chics. I also know a few of you ladies who have guys who sneak around and have came and passed on different diseases. Just imagine if they had given you the choice to be with them knowing they have someone else."
Lonnie and his wife, in happier times. Image: Facebook.
He maintained that if the women really loved him as they claimed to, they could work together to live in harmony. Or else.
"If rhese [sic] two do not learn to get along, I'm going to replace them both with two ladies who do not even speak english and who won't mind staying under the same roof," he continued. "Life will get real sweet then."