health

"I have 12 months to live." A man wants to know if he should tell his wife he's dying.

A man has just found out he has a year to live.

The 31-year-old has been dealing with a medical condition for a while, and always knew he’d have a shorter life than most.

But he’d been told he’d make it to 50 or 60.

But his condition has started to go downhill, and that projection has changed dramatically.

“A complication has cut that to 12 months, 16 at best. In about 10 months my condition should start to get a lot worse. After 12, I’ll essentially be living in the hospital,” he told Reddit in an anonymous post.

Elle Halliwell faced life and death in the same weekend and had to make a choice. Post continues after video.

Video by MMC

Here lies the man’s dilemma.

He doesn’t want to tell his wife.

“I have been married four years (no kids),” he writes. “I haven’t had the heart to tell my wife the news. I don’t even know how. We always knew I’d die younger than I wanted to, but we never expected it to be this soon.”

As much as he knows he should, he doesn’t want his last year to be one of impending doom.

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So, he plans to just use the money he’s been saving up for graduate school to take his wife on a big holiday to Australia for a few months instead.

“We can work part-time and enjoy our time together. When we get back or maybe towards the end of it, I will break the news to her,” he writes.

“I know my wife and she’s very emotional to the point where I feel like she will be crying everyday and not enjoying herself,” he continued.

“I just wouldn’t want the trip to be ruined for us by constant reminders of me dying. I want this memory to be a good one for her, and not plagued by my time ticking down.”

He ends his post with the question: “Am I an asshole for putting off telling her I am dying?”

He also adds that he has life insurance, so he’s not worried about spending all of his money and leaving her with nothing.

His heartfelt post has received nearly 800 comments.

“As a wife of a husband who is also dying please, please tell her. She’ll never forgive you if you don’t,” writes one commenter.

“She’ll pick up on the fact you’re hiding something from her which will strain the relationship,” added another.

“It would compound her grief tenfold to find out later that you’d hidden this from her, and chosen to deprive her of the chance to process with you,” said a third.

The resounding mood is one of a gentle push towards encouraging the man to not delay the inevitable and to tell his wife.

“This is very much her business, and she deserves to know,” said one woman.

Do you agree? Should the man tell his wife he’s dying or let her enjoy her holiday first? Let us know in the comments.

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