10 things that scream you're in a healthy relationship.

What makes a relationship strong? Or happy? Or healthy?

Turns out, what it takes is hard work, patience and a lot of empathy.

We asked Nahum Kozak, who is a Senior Psychologist at Lighthouse Relationships, what kinds of signs and markers people should look out for when they get into a relationship – good or bad.

Kozak said that unhealthy relationships carry problematic dynamics like intense conflict, a lack of trust, controlling behaviour, subtle or extreme forms of abuse, lack of support and isolation from others.

"These warning signs are all key indicators that you might not be in a healthy relationship," the psychologist tells Mamamia. 

Watch: Relationship deal-breakers. Post continues after video. 

Video via Mamamia.

But for a healthy relationship, the first question Kozak says we need to ask ourselves is, 'Am I happy in this relationship?'

"Or more specifically, 'Is there a greater ratio of positive interactions to negative ones?'" he explained. "A sign that things are going well is when your ratio for positive interactions is high. A good ratio is 20 positive interactions for a negative one.

"And when you're in conflict, it still needs to be positive-heavy... about five positive experiences for every negative one."


Here are 10 other signs that scream you're in a healthy relationship:

1. Genuine enthusiasm when your partner comes home.

(Even if you'd rather be alone, sometimes.)

2. Being in conflict without it being a deal breaker. 

Because it's better to communicate openly and honestly, before coming together to solve a problem, than battling it out and not working to fix anything.

3. Adapting to one another's love language(s). 

Some of us enjoy our partner cooking to show their love. Others might prefer physical affection or intimacy to feel appreciated and valued. It's all very well and good to know our own love language – but it's always a strength to know how our partners like to be loved, and adapt to it.

4. Knowing how to listen to one another. 

There's not much better than feeling heard and listened to without judgement.

5. Having conversations that lead to change and understanding.

Because if you can't evolve while you're together, is it worth staying in a relationship?

6. Feeling excitement for your partner when something good happens to them. 

A win for someone you love is a win for you too, right?

7. Setting healthy boundaries and following them.

Respecting your partner's boundaries says a lot about how you work together in a relationship. 

8. Not feeling the need to fake anything around your partner. 

Whether you need to scream, yell, yodel or sing at the top of your lungs, knowing you can be your authentic self around your partner is paramount to a successful relationship.

9. Feeling safe with one another.

Can you confide in your partner? Do you think of them when you think of a 'safe' space? Do you feel comfortable with them? Do you trust them? If you answered yes, that's a good sign!

10. Encouraging each other to succeed. 

Because, see point six – you're in this crazy thing called life together.

Feature Image: Getty.

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