By JENNA PRICE
The rampaging male libido is dying, killed by stress and exhaustion.
That’s the news from Australian sex therapists, either from their own clinical practice or from research.
Which is kind of a relief, isn’t it? Not the stress and exhaustion bit (been there, done that) but the fact that men will now be relieved from their duty of pretending they want to be top performers all the time. If you think about that critically, for even a minute, you know how unrealistic it is to imagine that men are permanently ready for sex.
Elaine George, who is midway through her PhD research into male sex drive, says the stereotype that men want sex at every opportunity just isn’t true any more, if it ever was. Her colleague Margaret Redelman has seen a definite increase in male clients who say they are experiencing low desire or a drop in desire. And recent Chinese research shows that sexual satisfaction for a couple is a two-handed play; in other words, it’s good for both of you and if you are having trouble, chances are your partner is too.
As a sex therapist, George wanted to find out exactly what gaps there were in the study of desire. What she discovered was that all the research on libido was about women. Did we enjoy it? Why didn’t we enjoy it? How could we enjoy it more? It was almost as if the study of male sexuality had no questions which needed answering. Even researchers had brainwashed themselves into thinking that men didn’t have a problem with sex.