We’ve sat through 290 bedroom reveals and finally – FINALLY – the only week that even matters has arrived.
I’m talking about kitchen week. Obviously.
But before we drooled over orgasmic copper kettles, there was an important matter to take care of. We needed to faux stress about Jason and Sarah being kicked off by Grumpy Scott Cam because last week they were all like “nah, ceebs” and… just… didn’t do anything.
We didn’t need to stress. They ended up completing three rooms in a single week, which is what the producers want us to call “the best Block comeback ever”, but really is just “what you can achieve when you’re excused from doing the stupid sponsored challenges”.
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Anyway, I digress. Here are the kitchens, rated from ‘least rich person worthy’ to ‘most rich person worthy’.
Clint and Hannah: 26/30
For a kitchen with about 12,000 ovens, 56 dishwashers and five wine storage areas, you’d think Clint and Hannah would pop a big-ass fridge into their ~luxury kitchen~.
Ha. Funny. But no.
Eating food is for LOSERS, haven't you heard?
Clint and Hannah are clearly not trying to sell their home to a family. No, no, their target market is 'alcoholics who travel in packs of five' - an affluent niche looking for property in Elsternwick, I hear.
Click through to see what Clint and Hannah's kitchen looked like...
Sticks and Wombat: 26.5/30
Apparently when you put a shit load of wood and metal into a room, it becomes what the pros call "raw luxury".
Ah yes, look at that $80,000 kitchen. So rustic. So rugged. So... raw.
Click through to see what Sticks and Wombat's kitchen looked like...
Ronnie and Georgia: 28/30
We learned another pearl of interior design wisdom during Ronnie and Georgia's room reveal. That is, "grey is the new white".
I really would've really appreciated it if someone told me when "white became the new black" but that's fine. I'll show myself out.