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Australia reacts to the great dog-related mystery of The Bachelor 2019.

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It happened. Our two favourite worlds collided and we finally feel complete.

An episode riddled with c-bombs, backstabbing, and barefaced lies, The Bachelor just went full MAFS and we want to thank everyone involved for making it happen (especially Trent from Punchy).

In the whodunnit mystery of the century, tonight’s Bachie ep revolved around the question: “Was Matt called a dog c*nt and a disrespectful pig or no?”

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Here’s how it all went down:

In one corner, we had Abbie, who had been feeling sick to her stomach about animal-inspired insults hurled around by the pool about her shared boyfriend, so of course, told him.

In the other, we had Monique, who wouldn’t dare call anyone a pig in her life but seemed unfazed by her alleged use of the c-word on national television.


Following a stunning acting performance by Monique, who all but managed to convince Matt she didn’t even know there was a pool at Bachie HQ (and truly deserves a Gold Logie), confusion engulfed the mansion.

Witness accounts were mixed:

“They’re just bogans! That’s how they talk!” said Sogand when pulled aside by Matt.

Elly, on the other hand, didn’t hear anyone say “haha,” which is the tell-tale sign that a joke has been told.

Emma definitely heard it and will take the stand in court if necessary, and another woman who we’ve never seen before did a very good job of looking genuinely shocked by the whole situation:

No but seriously who are you?

But poor Matt, looking confused and sad and maybe a little bit hungry, succumbs to the pressure of producers and keeps Monique in at the rose ceremony.

Here's how Twitter reacted to the spectacular mess:







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