'I might have ruined my relationship with my brother over my husband.'

A woman has asked for advice following a family argument that has threatened to fracture her relationship with her brother.

In a recent 'Am I The A**hole' post on Reddit, the 27-year-old shared that during a recent family gathering for Mother's Day, she had an uncomfortable disagreement with her brother in order to defend her husband.

Watch: 8 sings you're a toxic sibling. Post continues after video. 

Video via Mamamia.

"I come from a family of white-collar people," she wrote. "My dad (aged 60) owns his own business and my mum (aged 57) is a pediatric surgeon. My older brother (aged 30) is a lawyer and loves to boast about how much money he makes. He is always buying new watches and expensive suits. He also drives a Porsche and is engaged to who will be his third wife."

The woman shared that she is "more introverted" than her sibling and prefers to "fade into the background". 

While undeniably successful, she and her husband don't flaunt their wealth. 

"I created and operate my own business and make more than a decent living. My husband is a master electrician, and he owns a very successful business. He makes more than three times what I do," she explained, adding that they don't have any children so naturally spend less.

"We keep our income very low-key and don't spend money like my brother does. My parents are aware of how much my husband makes because we paid for their 35th wedding anniversary getaway and my dad saw the price tag."


With that context in mind, this is what the woman said went down at the Mother's Day brunch when both siblings presented their gifts. 

"Both my brother and I bought nice things for our mother as gifts. He bought her jewellery and I got her a certificate for several hand massages at a spa near the hospital [where] she works in. My mother thanked us, and my brother decided that it would be a good time to brag about how much the necklace cost," the woman said. 

"[He was] looking at my husband and joking about how he could never afford to buy a necklace like the one he got my mother. How my husband could never afford anything on an electrician's wage. He carried on like that until I had enough of him insulting my partner, who worked harder than my brother to get where he was."

She said she told her brother to "shut up" and informed him that her husband "makes twice what he does". 

"'Mother's Day is about [mum], not you,' were my exact words," she continued. "After my brother left, soon after I snapped at him, I apologised to my [mum], and we went on to have a wonderful dinner, where [mum] told my husband embarrassing stories about me when I was little."

Sadly, the situation only soured her relationship with her brother and sister-in-law, who both felt she was trying to embarrass him in front of their parents.

"My husband thanked me for standing up for him and my mum told me she had a lovely night while we were on the phone yesterday and told me she used some of the money on the certificate to get her wrists and fingers massaged after a 10-hour surgery," she said. "My brother's fiancee sent me a tirade of texts blasting me for embarrassing him in front of our parents and calling me an asshole. 


"I feel bad for causing drama but happy I stood up for my husband."

While most of the 900 comments were on the woman's side, some felt her husband's salary didn't need to be shared. 

"What your husband makes honestly isn't even relevant to the story. Your brother was being a d**k — that would still have been true, even if he'd been correct about how much your husband makes. He needed to be called out and told that this behaviour wasn't acceptable," one comment read. "That your brother happened to be wrong barely even matters, beyond the fact that it probably made it a little easier to make him shut up."

Others highlighted an issue between the gifts.

"Your brother embarrassed himself... his gift might've been more expensive but I feel like your gift was more thoughtful. I wouldn't have even thought about giving hand massages as a gift to a surgeon. What a great idea," another person said.

One of the top comments clearly pointed out the brother's mistake.

"Your brother is an idiot for not realising how much a master electrician can make. Your brother definitely IS the a**hole for saying the things to your husband that he did," the comment said. 

"He deserved to be called out. He owes everyone (especially your husband and mother) an apology."

Feature Image: Getty.

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