For vertically challenged people, being fun-sized isn’t really all that fun a lot of the time. There’s a reason so many hits come up when you type ‘Short people problems’ into Google… and that’s because us shorty’s have 99 problems and not being able to reach anything is just another one.
Presenting some annoying, awkward and otherwise downright frustrating scenarios that short people find themselves in. Constantly.
I’m not sure what it is about normal-sized people and thinking that a short person is some type of pet, but I swear to God if one more person pats me on the head, and makes an awwww noise, I might just actually give up and end up barking at them.
2) Not being taken seriously
This follows off point number one. When you’re trying to have an argument, and get your point across, it’s very hard to be taken seriously. I like to think people throw in the ‘You’re so cute when you’re angry!’ remark because they realise they’re wrong and I’m right. Or something.
And just try to be taken seriously when you’re in a meeting and your feet won’t reach the ground while sitting on a chair. It just ain’t going to happen. Learn to dangle your feet with authority.
3) Trying to order at bars, cafes or just ANYWHERE
That hand sticking up desperately trying to order a glass of wine after a hard day of work is me.
Mr Bartender, please stop ignoring me and curbing my alcoholic desires. Likewise people pushing in, I’m a real person too.
4) Becoming everyone’s favourite plaything
I was once out and got separated from my friends. Being short, I couldn’t easily scope them out on the dance floor. Cue Prince Charming* coming along. “YOU LOOK LOST!” he bellows. After telling him I’m simply looking for my friends, he picks me up, bounces me up and down, beams at me and says “You’re like a little doll! I could just keep you on my mantlepiece forever!”
*Mate. Put me down. Seriously.