kids

12 of the best punishments dished out by fed up parents.

Mums are awesome, I think we can all agree.

But one area where mums (and dads) can really shine is when it comes to disciplining their children. Sure, you can always resort to time outs, taking away privileges and no pocket money but why waste an opportunity for a little imagination?

I’ve heard it said that discipline is not so much about punishment but rather, a method of deterring your child from repeating the bad behaviour. Here’s some awesome ways to ‘deter’ your child that will give you some great stories for their 21st birthday.

Clean up

If you’re having issues with your kids not cleaning their bedrooms, take matters into your own hands. All you’ll need is a roll of large, opaque garbage bags. While the kids are at school, start bagging everything up. Just leave the essentials in the room like bed and linen.

Here’s the fun part. In order to get their stuff your child will need to buy it back from you. They can do this through doing chores around the house. Put a price on each bag, say $5 or $10 depending on the age of the child and the amount of work they’re doing.

The greatest part is that because you bagged the room up as it was, your kid will have no idea what’s in each bag. $15 could buy them back some toys and games, or it could be the smelly gym gear they left lying on the floor.

Take control of their Facebook account.

I’m a big believer of parents having access to their children’s online activities. Although times will probably change dramatically by the time my kids are old enough for Facebook accounts, I plan on having the passwords to everything.

Obviously this stems from a safety issues but it does have its upsides when it comes to discipline.

For a teenager, what could be worse than mum and dad taking control of their Facebook profile for a day, or a week.

Do with this information what you will but I’m guessing you’ve got some embarrassing baby photos in the archives, some touching lovely words you’d like to share about your partner publicly, or even some comments to leave on their friends pictures. What teenager wouldn’t love that?

Let them think they’ve won.

I recently heard saw this story and loved it so hard.

Basically child A is being a huge shit at the supermarket. He is begging his mother for lollies and chocolates and when she says no, erupts into a stage four meltdown. Child flings himself on to the floor and makes quite the scene.

Mum calmly picks up the chocolate that her child wanted and places it on the pile of shopping. Child A gets up and ceases his tantrum, believing that he has won and will soon be chomping down on that choccy goodness.

Mum pays for the shopping and secures her child into the trolley. She then turns to the little girl who was standing behind her, helping her mother in the queue and hands her the chocolate. “Good behaviour gets rewarded and bad behaviour does not,” she says as she walks away with her son.

Go mum!

Do it yourself.

This is another great idea for parents who are sick and tired of asking their kids to help with the washing up.

Give them a plate, bowl, cup and set of cutlery. Make sure they can tell it apart from the rest of the dishes in the house. Explain to them that no one else is allowed to use their stuff, but that no one else will be washing it up either.

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Make sure you have the camera out when they’re attempting to eat soup off a plate with a fork.

Join in.

I’ve heard of parents who have attended school with their kids after they were caught ‘wagging’. I don’t mean escorting the sulky teenager to school in the family car and leaving them at the gate. Oh no, I mean they actually went to school with their child and sat in on classes, had lunch with friends, even followed them to the bathrooms. One father made the punishment worse by refusing to shave for a week and wearing his pyjamas when he went to school with his daughter.

Yeah you are.

Go back to the old school ways.

Report writing is a great way for kids to learn their lessons and lets them use all those great skills they learn at school.

If you’re having issues with fighting, why not consider a report on famous fighters. Perhaps your issue is about not eating their dinner. Wouldn’t you love to read a well researched report on farming corn? I know I would.

But don’t make it easy on them. Kids these days have it too good. Oh no, your kids will be writing their reports with the assistance of an old school encyclopedia.

No where to hide.

Are you sick of copping attitude from your teenager? Wondering what they’re doing all the time holed up in their bedrooms? Wonder no more fellow parents. Next time little miss hands you some sass mouth and stomps off to her room, follow her. Take with you a screwdriver and take the door off the hinges. Make sure to wave every time you walk past.

Their first hangover.

Coping with your child’s first hangover can be tricky, so many issues to consider. Why not mull them over on a family day out to the trampoline park (bonus points is there is a child’s birthday on at the same time) or perhaps some fresh air on the open seas on a group sailing trip?

Wait-er round.

I am so sick of calling my kids for dinner that I think I’ll be borrowing this parenting tip. Last one to the table has to play the role of waiter for the rest of the family. “Another drink, please”, “I’d like some tomato sauce as well, thanks.”

Save it for a rainy day.

If your children ignore your repeated requests for them to pack away their toys, you do it. Put them all into a ‘rainy day box’ which only comes back, yep you guessed it, on a rainy day. This one is great because they’ll get the message that they lose access to toys they don’t clean up, and they’ll get the appeal of toys they haven’t seen for a while when it does actually rain.

Grand slam.

“Stop slamming doors!” Go on, how many times have you said it? You won’t need to repeat yourself again once you make them slam the door 100 times. Point made.

It’s your business to handle the business.

Some parents just know how to get through to their kids. One dad made an arrangement with his son that if he was allowed a dog, the boy was to take responsibility for cleaning up the dog poo in the yard. Fair deal.

Like a lot of kids though, his side of the bargain started slipping a little. So, dad made him run around the yard barefoot after he said he had picked up all the dog poo. Yard remained clean from that point on.

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