User Comments

olivia678 March 14, 2024

Amen, Holly Wainwright, amen!!

olivia678 May 9, 2023

I could not agree more with this article, thank you so much for making me feel seen. I couldn’t breastfeed my firstborn because of breast reduction surgery, and six lactation consultants, being stuck to a pump every 3 hours, and high-dose medication could not fix that problem. I was horribly shamed by well-meaning nurses who told me to “try harder” and “not give up” while my hungry baby cried because I physically couldn’t feed her. Then I would open a formula tin which had a label reminding me I was a failure. I will be filling out this survey right away!

olivia678 November 21, 2022

What a beautiful, exceptionally-written article. Shannon you have so much talent and an incredibly bright future ahead. 

olivia678 November 2, 2022

As with everything Holly writes, I want more! This feels like a first chapter in a book. I want to read the rest!

olivia678 September 13, 2022

Oh no. This is such a tricky one. On the one hand, I think it’s normal for men not to be as enthusiastic about kids until they have them and get to know them. A lot of men just can’t visualise their life with kids in it, especially if they don’t have that role-modelled in their lives. At the same time, every kid should be wanted - by both of their parents. I think you need to explore with your partner the reasons behind him not wanting children - I.e. is it that he just doesn’t feel the need (that might change as your mum says when he sees how important they are to you/ if people in his life start having kids and he can picture it for himself). When I met my husband, he said he wasn’t really fussed about having kids either way, and it was only when he saw his brother become a father he could picture how it might be great for him. If your partner is ideologically opposed or already exposed to lots of people with kids and can see it’s not for him, then it might be a dealbreaker for you. Hoping for your sake it’s the former xx

olivia678 August 24, 2022

Thank you for such an interesting and heartfelt article. I’m a mum of a little one in daycare and I often reach 2pm anxiously checking and re-checking my phone for photo updates of my daughter. I find myself getting distressed and disappointed if they’re not there at the usual time or don’t happen that day. It’s only because I miss my daughter, but I’m ashamed to say I never thought about this from the educator’s perspective. I will always look at it differently now, and focus on how grateful I am my daughter receives such amazing care at her centre. 

You obviously have a gift for childhood education and I’m sure you’ll find a rewarding next step in your career!

olivia678 July 6, 2022

Thank you so much for writing this article. I only wish I had read it a year ago when I too was pumping every 3 hours out of shame, anxiety and pressure from well-meaning lactation “experts”, only to produce a few drops for my hangry baby. It was months before I gave up and finally started to enjoy being a mother. You’ve put words to what I was feeling - it IS possible to be pro-breasfeeding and not anti-formula at the same time! 

olivia678 May 23, 2022

Thank you for writing this article, it makes me feel so seen. We are struggling with this exact thing. 

olivia678 March 6, 2022

Thank you Leigh!!

olivia678 August 16, 2021

This is such a powerful read and my heart aches for this woman. But I really wish that the title didn’t say “from EVERY new mother.” I do not want pregnant women to add this to their deepest fears which is are often already so great.

I have been a mother for four days. My partner is a new father. This is an important and powerful read for me to be able to place into words some feelings I have and may be able to have in future, and I’m grateful to the author for that. But every partnership is unique and although new fathers are often united by similar characteristics (as new mothers often are too), not every partnership will end in divorce. This article is a powerful warning but really needs to be framed to support women at such a vulnerable time, not terrify them and not alienate them from their new dads. This is mamamia - we're making the world a better place for women and girls. 

We have to treat new dads with the compassion afforded to new mums. Parenthood shakes your foundations, but new mothers - this is not the only path. You've got this.

Olivia678 July 30, 2021

What an interesting and well-written article. Thank you for making me think about this in a different way and challenging my assumptions. It feels like it’s getting harder and harder to do that as COVID drags on - I feel like we’re finding it harder to find our empathy. I need to read more things like this!