As told to Polly Taylor
My first reaction was disgust.
I was flicking through the newspaper and splashed across the page, amid the doom and gloom, were the words: 'Life is short. Have an affair.'
It was an advert for 'cheating' website, Ashley Madison. This was in 2015 and it was the first time I'd ever heard of it.
Watch: Emotional v.s. Physical Affairs. Post continues below.
The idea that people would sign up and actively seek an affair seemed so cold and calculated to me.
You might think that makes me a hypocrite given that in my then-15 year marriage, I'd already had two affairs.
While my husband was a wonderful man, there had been something missing from my marriage for some time, leading me to seek affection, love and sex elsewhere.
But to me, that was different. Meeting someone 'organically' and embarking on a love affair had a level of innocence to it. I hadn't sought it out and there were genuine feelings involved; I hadn't been someone's dirty little secret.
So yes, I was disgusted. But the more I read about the website, the more curious I became.
It seemed many of the women using it were sophisticated and intelligent. Like me, they were looking for something that was missing from their marriage.
Intrigued, I created a private email address and signed up.
I wasn't sure about it at first. Some men were sleazy all over me like flies, desperate to send dick pics.
The vast majority were just lonely, everyday blokes.
I started to get quite bullish about what I wanted. I started to go for coffees with the men I thought might actually give me what I wanted.
Then I met "Melbourne" — that was what I called him because that was where he'd relocated from, due to his wife's job. He was now working in the city I lived in and the attraction when we met up was instant.
Right from the start, he was very clear about one thing: he loved his wife.
"I wouldn't be doing this if she was sexually active," he told me.
This was a common thread with every man I got to know from the site: their wives have simply stopped giving them sex, or at the very least, become utterly complacent.
These men were missing cuddles, affection, compliments and... sex. They were so bereft of it that they were enchanted by the merest hint of a willing woman and a warm bed.