Excuse us, but we need to report a missing person.

At last night’s Married at First Sightdinner party someone was noticeably…absent.

Jules and Cameron were there representing all things good and pure in this world.

29-year-old ex-virgin Matt was there…blinking.

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Melissa was there, doin’ a Melissa.

Sam was present, highly contagious and covered in scabs.

Even Ines was there getting all thirsty over a highly contagious and covered in scabs Sam, who’s apparently a “cupcake”. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But Elizabeth was nowhere to be seen.

Sam said he hadn’t seen her and had no idea where she was.

No one seemed particularly concerned about this, they just ate their free dinner and screeched at each other about minuscule problems.

Anywho, we thought someone should look into the case of missing fake TV bride., because John Aiken doesn’t seem to care and that’s weird.

Here are our theories:

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