Yes, you read that correctly.
Yes, really. Bum psychics are a thing.
Technically, they’re called “rumpologists” and Rumpology is “the art of reading the lines, crevices, dimples, and folds of the buttocks to divine the individual’s character and gain an understanding of what has occurred in the past and get a prediction of the future.”
Sounds legit, no?
We can only assume their corporate motto is “Look behind you!”
If you were a young rumpologist trying to, ah, crack into the butt-prediction industry, you’d go straight to Instagram, wouldn’t you? It’s a treasure trove of bum selfies.
That’s exactly what Sam Amos, Rumpologist Extraordinaire in the UK, did. And here’s what she had to say about Rihanna’s famous behind:
“Well, she’s quite a feisty lady, and I would say a perfectionist. I would say she’s quite happy as well.”
If RiRi’s bum cheeks could talk, they’d tell the world that she’s clucky for a baby boy… apparently.
“She’ll get broody soon because one of her friends is going to have a baby girl,” Amos predicts. “I would also say she’s going to do more charity work, which will change her life in some way.”
Amos says a person’s butt will tell you everything about that person.
“It tells me about the character of a person, the good points and the bad points. The left butt cheek apparently is linked to the right hemisphere of the brain, and the right butt cheek will tell you all about your left brain.
X Factor winner Dami Im is a stunning flower child in Alannah Hill
Awesome fashion news: crazy-talented singer Dami Im, who took out the 2013 X Factor title, is the new face of label Alannah Hill.
And she looks absolutely heavenly. LOOK:
One Direction’s Liam has total meltdownThey’re the biggest band in the world right now, with the super-power to drive teenage girls wild with lust and loyalty. But for grown-ups who’ve seen it all before, watching One Direction’s world domination has always been a game of “Who will be the first to have a meltdown?”
And now we have an answer – it’s Liam Payne.
Liam tweeted eleven times in 23 minutes, causing #lazyjournos to trend globally.
To track the meltdown as it happened, check out our gallery: